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Song Parodies -> "Saint Nick Nicked for Knicker-Nicking"
Original Song Title:
"My Bonnie Lies Over The Ocean"
Original Performer:
Traditional
Parody Song Title:
"Saint Nick Nicked for Knicker-Nicking"
Parody Written by:
Phil Alexander
The Lyrics
A brief guide for our transatlantic friends, for whom these words may not have quite the same meaning:Nick - verb: to arrest... nicked=arrestedNick - verb: to steal.. nicker=thiefNick - noun: a prisonNick - short for Nicholas
I saw a red coat in my garden
I saw a white beard down there
I saw a red hat in my garden
And nicking my wife's underwear!
Chorus:
Saint Nick, oh! Saint Nick, no!
Nick has nicked knickers: oh, Saint Nick!
Saint Nick, oh! Saint Nick, no!
Nick has nicked knickers: he's sick
I called the police to arrest him
I called the police, they came quick
I called the police to arrest him
"'Ere Santa", they said "You've been nicked"
Chorus
The judge said: you sorry, sick, Santa
To nick knickers, Nick, is a crime
The judge said: you sorry, sick, Santa
For knicker-nicking you'll do time
Chorus
Saint Nick's been caught nicking knickers
Saint Nick, knicker-nicker's been nicked
Saint Nick has been caught nicking knickers
Knicker-nicker Nick's nicked in the nick
I saw a white beard down there
I saw a red hat in my garden
And nicking my wife's underwear!
Chorus:
Saint Nick, oh! Saint Nick, no!
Nick has nicked knickers: oh, Saint Nick!
Saint Nick, oh! Saint Nick, no!
Nick has nicked knickers: he's sick
I called the police to arrest him
I called the police, they came quick
I called the police to arrest him
"'Ere Santa", they said "You've been nicked"
Chorus
The judge said: you sorry, sick, Santa
To nick knickers, Nick, is a crime
The judge said: you sorry, sick, Santa
For knicker-nicking you'll do time
Chorus
Saint Nick's been caught nicking knickers
Saint Nick, knicker-nicker's been nicked
Saint Nick has been caught nicking knickers
Knicker-nicker Nick's nicked in the nick
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User Comments
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Whoa! What a tongue-and-eye-twister! I really appreciate how you explain all the different meanings of "nick" for uninformed Yanks like myself. Three fives.
got tongue tied reading thith..and now I can't thay my etheth..anyway..fiveth..
Perfect read, though a few lines (I saw a white beard down there, for example) doesn't fit exactly to the version I'm used to. That aside, this has potential to be a classic toungetwister.
The "I saw a white beard down there" scans with "My bonnie lies over the sea" (providing you pronounce "beard" with two syllables)...
But as it's Christmas Eve tomorrow, I guess I finished this in the ni... just in time ;-)
But as it's Christmas Eve tomorrow, I guess I finished this in the ni... just in time ;-)
Sounds like St. Nick was possessed by Old Nick.
Brilliant!
After reading this, I think I need some nic-otine...555
I can almost see this episode of "The Bill" Phil - 555
This is great stuff anyway, Phil. Allow me to suggest maybe "I saw a white beard and a deer" for that extra syllable.
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