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Song Parodies -> "If You're Biden And Don't Know It Crap Your Pants"

Original Song Title:

"If You're Happy And You Know It Clap Your Hands"

Original Performer:

Traditional

Parody Song Title:

"If You're Biden And Don't Know It Crap Your Pants"

Parody Written by:

Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd

The Lyrics

This one's for Shits & Giggles! We comedians really gotta hand it to The White House, as far as punnable political monikers go they sure have built back better!
If you're Biden and don't know it crap your pants
If you're Biden and don't know it crap your pants
Shit can happen in a stupor
Like that vatican-y blooper
If you're Biden and don't know it crap your pants

If you're Biden and don't know it fall asleep
If you're Biden and don't know it fall asleep
Like four hundred private pilots
At that summit on the climate
If you're Biden and don't know it fall asleep

If you're Biden and don't know it slur a speech
If you're Biden and don't know it slur a speech
If you lose all other talents
Podiums are good for balance
If you're Biden and don't know it slur a speech

If you're Biden and onstage with minor girls
If you're Biden and onstage with minor girls
Get confused when you are hands-on
And they're shouting "Let Go Brandon!"
If you're Biden and onstage with minor girls

If you're Biden and don't know it sniff some hair
If you're Biden and don't know it sniff some hair
Get some tightened tightie-whities
From your gomerpedoitis
If you're Biden and don't know it sniff some hair

If you're Biden and Kamala has your back
If you're Biden and Kamala has your back
Ballot harvesting the ghetto
Made you POTUS Uncle Peddo
If you're Biden and Kamala has your back

If you're Biden under fire go for broke
If you're Biden under fire go for broke
Borrow twenty billion trillions
Send the debt off to civilians
If you're Biden under fire go for broke

If you're Biden with Kamala at your side
If you're Biden with Kamala at your side
And your diaper squiggle trickles
You'll be known as SHITS & GIGGLES
If you're Biden with Kamala at your side

© Peter Andersson.
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Pacing: 4.0
How Funny: 4.0
Overall Rating: 4.0
Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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CML - November 09, 2021 - Report this comment
Have seen the photo in the Daily Mail that appears to capture the moment when Biden loosed the fart heard round the UK. It shows Biden with the beatific face of a toddler who just found relief from colic with some sort of colonic discharge and Camilla and some other duchess with looks of disgust on their faces. In a sane country, this would trigger an automatic, emergency 25th Amendment hearing
CML - November 09, 2021 - Report this comment
Biden way, the "Diarrhea Song" either started or was given prominence in the movie, "Parenthood." In an opening scene, a 10 year old boy, whos riding in the back seat on a long trip breaks into, "If you're sliding into home and your pants fill up with foam; diarrhea" ..... After a few stanzas, Steve Martin asks, "Where'd you learn that song?" And the kid says "Summer camp". To which Martin responds, "Well that was money well spent."
Jonathan - November 09, 2021 - Report this comment
hey, show some respect to the 39th mayor of australia! 5s
Libby - November 09, 2021 - Report this comment
CML, I look back with wistful serendipity upon that time Rod Rosenstein made the AWFUL, TREASONOUS suggestion that the 25th Amendment could have been pulled for The Donald. Oh, what could have been.
CML - November 10, 2021 - Report this comment
It was treasonous because it was absolutely unwarranted. Trump outwits the entire establishment and wins the election in spite the entire media being against him and you all immediately clamor for the 25th Amendment. When Biden farts in front of royalty and has a look on his face that suggests he needs to be fitted with a drool cup, (Hey, Drool Cup Joe) that suggests hes no longer fit to go out in public let alone be President
Libby - November 11, 2021 - Report this comment
I will bet that wasn't Rod Rosenstein's motivation.
American Veteran - November 22, 2021 - Report this comment
The diaper donald is an uncouth traitor p.o.s. If you follow that traitor fa pathise with that terrorist pukebrat, you are one. And if you can't write a parody better than this juvenile 2nd grade level pile of vulgar drivel, you are pathetic, uncouth, immature and another kID rock at best. This kind of crap is what most 3rd graders have outgrown. Boneheaded stupid Special high Intensity Training. 3000% shee-yitt. If you support the unqualified trash-talking terrorist traitior sassybrat Trump then you've just shown what an ignorant blubbering dummy you are. Bob Marley sez, 'Whom the cap fits, LET THEM WEAR IT'. If you're a disciple of the lippy Antichrist Traitor then you've just shown how you have no respect for others or even YOURSELF. You ought to be ashamed of youeself for being such a sucker and this 'parody' is a sick repulsive JOKE by every definition of the word.
Peter Andersson - November 24, 2021 - Report this comment
@ American Veteran: I'll writer a better parody when Biden makes more gaffes, or maybe I'll just add more verses to this one, could reach record levels by 2024. :-)
Guy - November 24, 2021 - Report this comment


Peter you know who I am and I am, as another American USAF retired veteran very embarrassed by "American Veteran's" comment above. I was spat upon, in uniform, by hippies in San Francisco in the early 1970s returning from Japan.

These hippies are now ultra lefties, many of which hold high to the highest political offices in the US with Do Jo Biden at the helm. Unlike "American Veteran" above I am not hiding behind a "pseudo-name". You know me. I've written on this site as far back as 2003.

I dismiss what "American Veteran" has to say. I don't thank AV for his/her service but instead thank him/her for his/her presence, assuming that this person showed up for work when it was required.

I know the type. Thankfully they were as I like my beef steak, rare. I fear the US military is filling up with lefties. Biden and AV can F-up a one man rock fight or even a soup sandwich for that matter.

Now that I got that off my chest where it was she-iting up my medals, I'm ready to sing praise to this great write. I think this write is clever and sadly true. Go head and write up some more gaffes by Do Jo Biden. Lots of LOLs in this parody. I love it. This is completely 5 material.
Peter Andersson - November 27, 2021 - Report this comment
Thanks Guy, I appreciate the comment and can guess who you are. I'd also say we're both "veterans" from the peak years of Amiright about fifteen years ago when this site often saw five parodies like this one per day, wildly slugging in all directions, without easily offended dudes and dudettes getting their panties in a twist. I learned a lot about writing technique back then, this parody would only have been maybe 3 verses without it.
Guy - November 27, 2021 - Report this comment


Peter, you have guessed correctly. To confirm check just above your name on the author's page of this site.

I lost my wife in 2014 after a lengthy illness. This sort of put the kibosh on my parody writing among many other things.

I know that we used to use email in order to communicate back in the day. I searched my folders and found two instances of communications using your name and K1chyd but they involved communications with Tommy Turtle. Unfortunately there is no way to reach out to Tommy to get your email address since I understand that, sadly Tommy is no longer with us.

I'd love to be able to message with you again over email. My email address has not changed. Perhaps you still have my email address maybe in your email somewhere. If you do and you'd like to message again, please send me a short message so we can reestablish contact.

I no longer have access to my account on the message board since I abandoned that years ago. I suppose I could contact ChuckyG and ask him politely to reestablish my access, but I'm not ready to do that yet.

Please let me know if you'd like to message with me again and catch up a bit. Meantime I'll try to revive my account on the message board.
Guy - November 27, 2021 - Report this comment
Peter,

Please check the message board. I sent you a message from there. I'd like to confirm that my message arrived.

Thanks
Peter Andersson - November 28, 2021 - Report this comment
Confirmed! I just sent you an answer there too.
Guy - November 30, 2021 - Report this comment
Hey, Peter - I got it and thanks a bunch. I'm going to be busy until after, Saturday, 4 Dec 2021. I'll get back to you sometime after that.

Thank you so much for obliging my request.

=;-)

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