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Song Parodies -> "Simon’s Tight"

Original Song Title:

"Silent Night"

Original Performer:

Traditional

Parody Song Title:

"Simon’s Tight"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Simon’s tight; Homer’s tight—
brawling harm, squalling fight.
Roundhouse hurtin’; scuffling, riled.
Blows from fisticuffs that are not mild.
Beatings aren’t dealt in peace;
beatings cleave a chin piece.

Simon’s might; Homer’s might—
a jaw breaks, cannot bite.
Gory streams from a nose bent back far;
orbits blackened the color of tar.
Biting ears as if corn,
biting ears leaves one shorn.

Simon’s plight; Homer’s plight—
pummeled bods are a sight.
Razor-like seams in pried and poked face;
come the dawn, it’s a hospital place.
Beatings borne without mirth;
streaming gore, and no dearth.
Fees will soar above earth.

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