Jah, my name is Friedrich Mueller and I'm German all the way.
That is except for once a year, and that's Saint Patty's Day.
So I'll be celebrating and I'll make each party scene.
I'll drink my normal keg of beer although they've dyed it green.

The WASPs will drink until they can't think. The Poles will chug it down.
The streets of Zinzinnati will look like old Dublin town.
'Though me and Hans Schlager will drink too much lager, we will not be distressed.
If they could dance the polka it would be Oktoberfest.

Italians will celebrate as on Columbus Day.
The Scots will drink the whole day long if someone else will pay.
The Mexican folks will say "Viva!" for San Patricio.
The Swedes and the Norwegians will not care if there is snow.

The French will reel and go to the Bastille. The Slavs will congregate,
The Greeks I know will drink ouzo and smash green Irish plate.
And each Oriental will get sentimental when they sing Danny Boy,
While rappin' blacks will come in packs to share in Irish joy.

My neighbor's Sol Abramowitz. He's happy and here's why:
His law firm will will busy. There'll be lots of D.U.I.
Whatever your people get high as a steeple in manners which befits.
Today we'll all be Irish. Hell, we'll even take the Brits!

It comes each year. We'll drink green beer, and shout "Erin Go Braugh!".
The Cajuns have been partying nonstop since Mardi Gras.
For there's no demeaning the boisterous greening when we all come to play.
It may be called Saint Patrick's but it's "We're All Irish Day"!