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Song Parodies -> "Don't Young Things Have Flowers Anymore? (A Father's Lament, Part II)"
Original Song Title:
"You Don't Bring Me Flowers"
(MP3)Original Performer:
Neil Diamond
Parody Song Title:
"Don't Young Things Have Flowers Anymore? (A Father's Lament, Part II)"
Parody Written by:
Tommy Turtle
The Lyrics
Please also see Part I, "Has Ev'rybody Seen My Gal (Nude? -- A Father's Lament, Part I)
Young girls don't have flowers
Texting pictures of thongs
Can't bear vir-gin-ity anymore
Not to come is a bore
No more "Wedding's the day"
I remember when
They'd say, "Must wait to love me"
Used, first date? No; leave, she
Now they're all lovin', each date, each night
They have wood for you
And you're sayin' "Alright"
Kindly just roll over
Doggie-style, in sight
No, young girls don't have flowers anymore
They used to stay so natural
With H. Imperforata [1]
But "unused, she" don't count anymore
They just lay till they're sore
While old creeps are away
But Baby, please remember
All the things, can caught, be
Get burned by the syph'
Or by herpes, oh my!
Full of "child of love" [2]
Or catch AIDS, and you die
So, please hear my concern
(Maybe hump, staying dry?)
'Cause Daddy waits up hours at the door
[1] (Medical Latin) -- intact hymen
[2] i. e., pregnant.
Texting pictures of thongs
Can't bear vir-gin-ity anymore
Not to come is a bore
No more "Wedding's the day"
I remember when
They'd say, "Must wait to love me"
Used, first date? No; leave, she
Now they're all lovin', each date, each night
They have wood for you
And you're sayin' "Alright"
Kindly just roll over
Doggie-style, in sight
No, young girls don't have flowers anymore
They used to stay so natural
With H. Imperforata [1]
But "unused, she" don't count anymore
They just lay till they're sore
While old creeps are away
But Baby, please remember
All the things, can caught, be
Get burned by the syph'
Or by herpes, oh my!
Full of "child of love" [2]
Or catch AIDS, and you die
So, please hear my concern
(Maybe hump, staying dry?)
'Cause Daddy waits up hours at the door
[1] (Medical Latin) -- intact hymen
[2] i. e., pregnant.
© 2010 Tommy Turtle. All rights reserved. E-mail: tomm...@yahoo.com
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User Comments
Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.
Quite a tale for "Valentines DaY"????
LOL
I weep for the death of innocence, but shed tears of laughter for this parody! ;D
This hits the "G" spot for great. Spoofing with a titillating twist.
Not only just a father's nightmare, even mother's get affected by their daughter's display of impurity. I also heard of the pregnancy pact in Massachussetts, and they made a Lifetime movie out of it. This kind of satire should be played in the Lifetime channel as well as your first part of this song.
Perhaps it's because I work with teens, but I actually found this one quite poignant.
"They used to stay so natural With H. Imperforata [1]" -- brilliant
"They used to stay so natural With H. Imperforata [1]" -- brilliant
Too funny. too true and trewe ewe! Bravo TT!
Interesting choice of parody. Bittersweet. LIked it a lot.
Great parody, great subject matter, 5s, and no comment regarding whether or not I'm a virgin.
interesting
Mark Scotti: Cute-pid comment!
Old Man Ribber: Poetic! (seriously)... thanks!
FS TEA: And you hit TT's "T" spot -- for "thanks".
Christie Marie M: If only they would play it -- I could use the royalties. If you submit to them as my agent, I'll pay you 10% -- and give thanks anyway for v/c!
Fiddlegirl: Poignancy was intended; pregnancy usually is not. Glad it resonated that way for you. (Betcha didn't know yer collab had a poignant side, didja?) ... thanks for the line shout-out. :)
Imperfor-Yoda: Quite the thanks to you I give!
Warren Baker: Bittersweet write, as well, Thanks for empathizing and for v/c.
Andria: OK, I won't comment -- a gentleman never tells, anyway. ;-) Thanks for v/c.
Old Man Ribber: Poetic! (seriously)... thanks!
FS TEA: And you hit TT's "T" spot -- for "thanks".
Christie Marie M: If only they would play it -- I could use the royalties. If you submit to them as my agent, I'll pay you 10% -- and give thanks anyway for v/c!
Fiddlegirl: Poignancy was intended; pregnancy usually is not. Glad it resonated that way for you. (Betcha didn't know yer collab had a poignant side, didja?) ... thanks for the line shout-out. :)
Imperfor-Yoda: Quite the thanks to you I give!
Warren Baker: Bittersweet write, as well, Thanks for empathizing and for v/c.
Andria: OK, I won't comment -- a gentleman never tells, anyway. ;-) Thanks for v/c.
Mush have cross-posted at the time. Is saying "thanks" 2 1/2 years later better than never?
Vaguely know OS, but your usual paradise of perpiscacious perfidious parodoxical parody, softened with sentient sentences.
Lifeliver: Appreciate astute and alliterative appraisal and assay, and answers e-mail question re: pursuing advanced degrees.
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