D’oh! captain, why captain?! The fearful trip is done.
The ship is tethered on the rocks, awash in waves and sun.
The port was near; you did o’er-steer to do some queer hot-dogging.
Then rocks that rise did rend the keel, the vessel listing, sogging.
That was not too smart.
Soon passengers would be dead
And later the captain would lie. . .
How he navigated.

D’oh! captain, why captain?! The story you would tell!
Wise up! No one’s buying that dung about why the ship fell.
For you took off, flew from the reef, steaming for shore, a coward,
Leaving behind a swaying mass of people streaming bow-ward.
Fear, captain, had grabbed ya,
So, quickly off you sped.
Passengers teemed upon the deck;
You saved your neck, you fled.

Vile captain did not answer the Coast Guard; he was still,
Busy keeping himself from harm; too bad drowned ain’t got gills.
The ship was “anchored,” run aground, the skipper on the run.
At last his lips started to drip with words, but of truth, none.
The Coast Guard screamed: “Get back and tell
Who’s alive and who’s dead!”
What’s next for captain despised?
To court he’ll be led.