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Song Parodies -> "The Sack Full of Letters"
Original Song Title:
"The Attack on Rue Plumet"
Original Performer:
The Cast Of "Les Miserables"
Parody Song Title:
"The Sack Full of Letters"
Parody Written by:
Glynn Leaney
The Lyrics
Part 31 of "The Unfortunates" sees men who want to expose Connor for what he was, and Catherine wanting to defend him.
THE SACK FULL OF LETTERS
(Thomas from the office arrives, sack in hand)
Catherine
Thomas, where are you going,
And what’s that in your hand?
Thomas
Our MP lives in that house
Toss pot, thinks he’s so grand!
You know him as Gordon Glee
Who won his seat five years ago.
He’s done something in the past
And we know something you don’t know!
Catherine
All right, so why not tell me
If it’s so bloomin’ bad,
And tell me what you’re planning,
Or are you raving mad?
What can I do, what’s to be done?
Is it really naughty
Or is it lots of fun?
(Stanley arrives with others from the office)
Stanley
This is the place
He’s a crafty one, our man;
Gets himself around a lot.
But we have a cunning plan,
I’m sure you’ll agree!
Long time ago
He placed a very big bet
But not with his own money.
He may have settled his debt
But doesn’t fool me!
Brian
Couldn’t care less what he has done,
Let’s do our thing, then we can run!
Stanley
Patience old man,
All in good time.
(He notices Catherine)
Brian
Who’s this lass here?
Stanley
She’s from the office.
Dan
It’s our own Catherine
Looking a little lost.
What are you doing round here?
Stanley
Catherine, bugger off!
You’re better off not here.
You don’t want to get involved.
Catherine
I know this man.
He’s done well as far as I’m concerned.
Can’t say the same for his girl
Who’s joined our office of late.
Stanley
Don’t get involved with what we do.
We’re better off without the likes of you!
Brian
She’s looking mad.
Charlie
Well, wouldn’t you!
Thomas
Piss off, Catherine,
Piss off, go on your way!
Catherine
I want to scream, you’re treating me like dirt!
Stanley
It isn’t that, we just don’t want to see you hurt.
Charlie
What a carry on.
Why not just let her stay.
It’s not as if you’re her father,
Let her have it her way.
Brian
Keep it down over there!
Catherine
Well you can’t say that I didn’t warn you, here goes…
(She screams in frustration)
Stanley
You stupid girl, we’re only here
To leave these letters at his door
To let him read what others think,
And hopefully kick up a stink!
(The men leave a sack of mail, then leave)
(Thomas from the office arrives, sack in hand)
Catherine
Thomas, where are you going,
And what’s that in your hand?
Thomas
Our MP lives in that house
Toss pot, thinks he’s so grand!
You know him as Gordon Glee
Who won his seat five years ago.
He’s done something in the past
And we know something you don’t know!
Catherine
All right, so why not tell me
If it’s so bloomin’ bad,
And tell me what you’re planning,
Or are you raving mad?
What can I do, what’s to be done?
Is it really naughty
Or is it lots of fun?
(Stanley arrives with others from the office)
Stanley
This is the place
He’s a crafty one, our man;
Gets himself around a lot.
But we have a cunning plan,
I’m sure you’ll agree!
Long time ago
He placed a very big bet
But not with his own money.
He may have settled his debt
But doesn’t fool me!
Brian
Couldn’t care less what he has done,
Let’s do our thing, then we can run!
Stanley
Patience old man,
All in good time.
(He notices Catherine)
Brian
Who’s this lass here?
Stanley
She’s from the office.
Dan
It’s our own Catherine
Looking a little lost.
What are you doing round here?
Stanley
Catherine, bugger off!
You’re better off not here.
You don’t want to get involved.
Catherine
I know this man.
He’s done well as far as I’m concerned.
Can’t say the same for his girl
Who’s joined our office of late.
Stanley
Don’t get involved with what we do.
We’re better off without the likes of you!
Brian
She’s looking mad.
Charlie
Well, wouldn’t you!
Thomas
Piss off, Catherine,
Piss off, go on your way!
Catherine
I want to scream, you’re treating me like dirt!
Stanley
It isn’t that, we just don’t want to see you hurt.
Charlie
What a carry on.
Why not just let her stay.
It’s not as if you’re her father,
Let her have it her way.
Brian
Keep it down over there!
Catherine
Well you can’t say that I didn’t warn you, here goes…
(She screams in frustration)
Stanley
You stupid girl, we’re only here
To leave these letters at his door
To let him read what others think,
And hopefully kick up a stink!
(The men leave a sack of mail, then leave)
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