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Song Parodies -> "New FG-42"

Original Song Title:

"I Put a Spell on You"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Screamin' Jay Hawkins

Parody Song Title:

"New FG-42"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

In early WW2 the Germans were developing the first true assault rifles, the MP-43/STG-43/STG-44 family for the Heer while the Luftwaffe wanted another weapon for themselves using the Mauser 7.92x57mm full cartridge round instead of the intermediate round that the MP-43 took. Eight companies were asked to submit designs but Rheinmetall-Borsig was chosen. This was the first version of the rifle with a fixed pistol grip and different butt and flash suppressor. Because Rheinmetall-Borsig was overloaded, however, Krieghoff made a second version with several design changes for ease of manufacture. Only 7000 were made and its first use was in the rescue of Mussolini from Gran Sasso in September 1943. The new weapon has synthetic furniture, multiple railings for optics and lasers, a new pistol grip, new butt, and new flash suppressor. It is meant for the civilian market; hence, it is semi-automatic only and costs a whopping $5000 each!
New FG-42
In semi

Now resurrected and improved
Tech applyin’
For modifyin’

Fallschirmjaeger bandit
Took full cartridge round
In war it was deadly
It makes sense to bring it back around

New FG-42
In semi
This time

7-9-2 (mm)
7-9-2 (mm)
7-9-2 (mm)
Is the same caliber
Rails here and there
New suppressor
Syn furniture

It’s costly
New FG-42
In semi
($5k a piece!)
New version: http://www.arrse.co.uk/attachment.php?attachmentid=73775&d=1335795261 Old versions: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/1/1a/FG42.jpg/300px-FG42.jpg At Gran Sasso: http://www.combatreform.org/Image1059.jpg

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 11

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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Brock O'Brahma - August 07, 2012 - Report this comment
They both look like they could stop a charging Hammerhead Titanothere!
Rob Arndt - August 07, 2012 - Report this comment
Slight technical error in history. Rheinmetall-Borsig did indeed win the contract but the German War Bureau didn't want to waste additionl space on the rifle, so Krieghoff was used to start manufacturing the weapons as Rifle A with the other butt, suppressor, and angled grip. RB's Rifle B followed. You can see in the Gran Sasso pic that first use was of Kreighoff Rifle A. The new version is however based on Rifle B but in semi-automatic. Other WW2 weapons the Germans brought back are the MG-3 (MG-42 mod), Pzf-3T (Panzerfaust mod), and RGW-90 (Modern Panzerschreck).
Rob Arndt - August 08, 2012 - Report this comment
BoB, naw, you'd need something heavier like this Solothurn S-18/100 20mm: http://www.shoporiental.com/Images/Picproduct/Guns/S18_100/Gun_S18e.JPG

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