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Song Parodies -> "Weird Tale of WW2"

Original Song Title:

"I Put a Spell in You"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Screamin' Jay Hawkins

Parody Song Title:

"Weird Tale of WW2"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

One of the strangest tales of WW2 I have ever read about was the German Army's plan to arm BDM athletic girls and train them for covert operations under the guise of being nuns!!! They were to be armed with light small arms and explosives hidden under their garments and also hollowed-out Bibles with pistols and explosives! Prior to a Blitzkrieg invasion in 1940, they were to be air-dropped into various nations and tasked with securing strategic targets while sabotaging others. It was believed that no nationaity of soldier would suspect a nun of being an enemy. As such, they could approach and occupy targets easily with minimal training since the BDM (like the HJ) performed regular physical and psychological training. But the Operation "Blume" (Flower) never materialised b/c Hitler would never approve of female soldiers in any form. Aryan policy was the three Ks which translated into English meant "Children", "Kitchen", and "Church" for women. To a higher standard, a German female was to bear male children for the Reich for continuous war. The SS used this as the basis of their Aryan procreation Lebensborn program. So no KGK (KampfGruppeKirche) Kommandos took part in the 1940s campaigns against Denmark, Norway, France, and the Low Countries. It would have been interesting to see how they would have performed. German women were allowed into limited war production, as test and ferry pilots, concentration camp guards, and both flak and naval helferinen. Hanna begged Hitler in March 1945 to form an all-female combat unit and got permission only to have it rescinded 7-10 days later. It was to be NSFK female trainers flying suicide missions for the Luftwaffe either in the Reichenberg R.IV suicide craft (manned V-1) or He-162 jet fighters!
Weird tale of WW2
from ‘39

German Army female kommandos
Nun costumes
Codename “Blume”

Covert force in habits
Meant to hold ground
Beautiful but deadly
Ju-52s would parachute them down

Weird tale of WW2
from ‘39
wrong time

Three K rules
Three K rules
Three K rules
Prevented their training
SS aware
Girls meant for babies
Lebensborn mating…

Lunacy
Weird tale of WW2
from ‘39
(German females denied equality)

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.3
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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Patrick - February 10, 2012 - Report this comment
I grew up in Catholic schools, so I found nuns kind of scary. Especially when they stopped wearing rosary beads so they could sneak into classrooms without alerting the students. A whole army of nuns could have overrun any country.
Rob Arndt - February 10, 2012 - Report this comment
During WW2 it was the British that hired theatrical performers as spies and also magicians to fake the fake cardboard army and infantry opposite Calais to fool the Germans. The Germans too used pychics and made fake elaborate wooden airfields and mock radars!!! My parody of today deals with that Weird War II aspect! But even if the did not use the girls, they did use the HJ boys for combat up until the end in Berlin. That famous "last" photo of Hitler decorating HJ AT victors is actually third from last (Hiter looking out at the rubble of the Chancellory).
Sister Mary Knucklewhacker - February 11, 2012 - Report this comment
This was so nunderful

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