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Song Parodies -> "Ball Tank of World War II"

Original Song Title:

"I Put a Spell on You"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Screamin' Jay Hawkins

Parody Song Title:

"Ball Tank of World War II"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

The Kugelpanzer literally translates as “Ball Tank” and is the most rare and strange armored fighting vehicle ever built. Only one lone example of this Reconnaissance Rollzeug (Rolling Vehicle) has been captured by the Russians and it survives today as part of the Kubinka Museum’s collection of German armored vehicles. The Kugelpanzer is simply listed as Item #37 and has been painted over gloss white. From fragmentary information sources, the drive has been removed from the vehicle and no metal samples are allowed taken from it. The history of the vehicle is literally unknown, as no documents were found with it and the vehicle had no clear markings. Only six firm facts are available: 1) The Kugelpanzer was a German-made vehicle shipped to Japan via technology transfer 2) The Kugelpanzer was a light Reconnaissance AFV 3) The Kugelpanzer was captured by the Russian Army in 1945 in Manchuria 4) The Kugelpanzer was plated with only 5mm of armor on its hull 5) The Kugelpanzer was powered by a single cylinder two-stroke engine 6) The Kugelpanzer was operated by one person It is hard to speculate on how this machine functioned, but from observation it appears to be a one man reconnaissance tank with an armored shell and view port. Perhaps under or behind the operator an engine was mounted and for stability a small directional wheel was located at the rear to steer the two large hemispherical disc tracks at the sides. When not on the move, the Kugelpanzer would become an armored shelter or perhaps a pillbox “if” any weapon could be fired from it. It is not clear from photographic evidence if a firing port was located under the view port. Since this vehicle had come from Germany, then the primary armament of this vehicle would have probably been a German 7.92mm MG-34 or MG-42 machine gun. Japanese machine guns were poorly manufactured and functioned badly in the field along with their single type of submachine gun in production. From photographic evidence it appears that this single machine was captured fully intact, having seen no combat at all. It is also widely speculated that only Krupp could have built this machine.
Ball tank of World War II
a unique find

Rollzeug, oddest armor of WW2
There’s no denyin’
This thing wasn’t fightin’

The Russians couldn’t understand it
Tank rollin’ around
Captured in Manchuria
Unstable, it could simply be knocked down

Ball tank of World War II
a unique find
From 1945

We see it
We see it
We see it
But can’t believe it- wow!!!
Operated off 2-stroke engine
5mm of armor plating
It sits in a museum right now

German insanity
Ball tank of World War II
a unique find
(was sent to Japan for free)

~ gives new meaning to the term “LIGHT tank”!!!
http://strangevehicles.greyfalcon.us/Pictures/kp1.png http://strangevehicles.greyfalcon.us/Pictures/kp2.png http://strangevehicles.greyfalcon.us/Pictures/kp3.png http://strangevehicles.greyfalcon.us/Pictures/kp4.png http://strangevehicles.greyfalcon.us/Pictures/kp5.png

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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User Comments

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Wild Child JIN - July 06, 2011 - Report this comment
Tanks a lot for this great parody Rob! ;-) 5's! :-)
Patrick - July 06, 2011 - Report this comment
I'm picturing in my mind one of those toys people get for their pet gerbils. A gerbil with a black tunic and visor cap. I've got to look this one up.
Rob Arndt - July 06, 2011 - Report this comment
Patrick... you are aware that I posted the pic links right here on the page in the bottom box below the lyrics??? There's 5 of them!!!
John Barry - July 06, 2011 - Report this comment
Your best "Spell" take-off yet, IMO as an aficionado.
Rob Arndt - July 06, 2011 - Report this comment
JAB- YOU are the undisputed MASTER of the SJH IPASOY parody!!! You have 387 to my 111!!! MASTER, WHAT IS THY BIDDING???

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