Moe’s the mean one, Moe’s the mean one—he will maim you,
stick his fingers in your eyes when he gets riled.
He might poke you or palm-stroke you or inflame you
with a blow torch; his manner is far from mild.

He’s not mild, easily riled is Moe, the mean one,
but though he is a Stooge, he is pretty smart.
Larry might fight back if he had more pep,
but just lies there with that wires hair.
Without warning he beats, Moe the mean one.
Don’t ever hit him in the face with a cream tart!

He’s not mild, an angry child is Moe, the mean one;
he’ll give you a contusion and it will smart.
Curly don’t fight back, though he has more pep—
way up high there: ain’t no guy hair.
He is far from effete, Moe the mean one;
if he enters a room, it’s best that you depart.

Moe’s the mean one; Moe will beat one.