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Song Parodies -> "Dacre is a Real Bell-End"
Original Song Title:
"Diamonds are a Girl's Best Friend"
(MP3)Original Performer:
Marilyn Monroe
Parody Song Title:
"Dacre is a Real Bell-End"
Parody Written by:
Phil Alexander
The Lyrics
Paul Dacre, editor of the Daily Mail (need I say more?). Some might consider this sort of an attack parody, but if you knew what the chap was really like, you'd see just how complimentary it is when compared to the man himself.
The press behaved atrociously
Many soon will be in jail
But, alas, not the putrid scum who runs
The Daily Mail
You might think Piers Morgan is somewhat offensive
But Dacre is a real bell-end
His obnoxiousness is, well, quite comprehensive
He's the kind of twat
Makes you think "did I step in that?"
One o' those guys
All should despise
And attempt really hard to offend
He brings so much rancour
That vile, noxious wanker
Dacre is a real bell-end
He may hear this song and then.. call for his lawyer
'Cause Dacre is a real bell-end
But, hey, Mr D. I've a message for ya
I can't libel you
If everything I say is true
I'll be blunt
You utter twunt
It'll do you no good to pretend
So don't sue or tease us
You ain't f***ing Jesus
Dacre, you're a real bell-end
In matters of science, or subjects political
Paul Dacre is a real bell-end
When sex is involved, he is so hypocritical
It's pornography - unless it's in the Mail (tee hee)
He'll print pix of pre-teen chicks
Standards so low, you can't comprehend
A slithering snake-a
The slimeball Paul Dacre
Dacre is a real bell-end
Many soon will be in jail
But, alas, not the putrid scum who runs
The Daily Mail
You might think Piers Morgan is somewhat offensive
But Dacre is a real bell-end
His obnoxiousness is, well, quite comprehensive
He's the kind of twat
Makes you think "did I step in that?"
One o' those guys
All should despise
And attempt really hard to offend
He brings so much rancour
That vile, noxious wanker
Dacre is a real bell-end
He may hear this song and then.. call for his lawyer
'Cause Dacre is a real bell-end
But, hey, Mr D. I've a message for ya
I can't libel you
If everything I say is true
I'll be blunt
You utter twunt
It'll do you no good to pretend
So don't sue or tease us
You ain't f***ing Jesus
Dacre, you're a real bell-end
In matters of science, or subjects political
Paul Dacre is a real bell-end
When sex is involved, he is so hypocritical
It's pornography - unless it's in the Mail (tee hee)
He'll print pix of pre-teen chicks
Standards so low, you can't comprehend
A slithering snake-a
The slimeball Paul Dacre
Dacre is a real bell-end
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