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Song Parodies -> "You Couldn't Just Get Me a Tie...?!?"
Original Song Title:
"I Want a Hippopotamus For Christmas"
Original Performer:
Gayla Peevey
Parody Song Title:
"You Couldn't Just Get Me a Tie...?!?"
Parody Written by:
hec
The Lyrics
Also from my days as a shopping center employee, from back when the "Billy Bass" was a big thing... and everywhere you turned there was another of the damn things singing at you. [This one varies in structure slightly from the original, but the meter was as close as I could make it.]
1] I got a big obnoxious fish for Christmas,
And if I find out who it's from I'll sue:
Yeah, it's amusing
Once, maybe twice:
But when you've heard it all day long, a hammer would be nice!
2] I got a big obnoxious fish for Christmas,
And now I'm at a loss for what to do:
I thought "hooray!",
I'd silenced it-- but then
Some fool came along and put the batteries back in!
B1}Why did I not just skip town for Christmas?!?--
This thing's got me scared...
Oh, I knew it wasn't socks when I opened up the box,
And had a coronary then and there...
3] I got a big obnoxious fish for Christmas,
But how do I return it? Tell me true...
Everybody sells 'em,
Much to my distress,
And where I'd go with no receipt is anybody's guess!
B2} If I had my way, I'd get a hacksaw:
Fish bits everywhere!!!
I'd prefer the chicken pox to the fish inside the box,
What a big pain in my derriere!
4] I got a big obnoxious fish for Christmas,
I guess I'll hafta keep it looking new...
Gotta save the box,
And all the other crap,
Put it in the closet with the rolls of Christmas wrap...
So next year I can pass it on to you!!!
And if I find out who it's from I'll sue:
Yeah, it's amusing
Once, maybe twice:
But when you've heard it all day long, a hammer would be nice!
2] I got a big obnoxious fish for Christmas,
And now I'm at a loss for what to do:
I thought "hooray!",
I'd silenced it-- but then
Some fool came along and put the batteries back in!
B1}Why did I not just skip town for Christmas?!?--
This thing's got me scared...
Oh, I knew it wasn't socks when I opened up the box,
And had a coronary then and there...
3] I got a big obnoxious fish for Christmas,
But how do I return it? Tell me true...
Everybody sells 'em,
Much to my distress,
And where I'd go with no receipt is anybody's guess!
B2} If I had my way, I'd get a hacksaw:
Fish bits everywhere!!!
I'd prefer the chicken pox to the fish inside the box,
What a big pain in my derriere!
4] I got a big obnoxious fish for Christmas,
I guess I'll hafta keep it looking new...
Gotta save the box,
And all the other crap,
Put it in the closet with the rolls of Christmas wrap...
So next year I can pass it on to you!!!
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