Five
One, four, five
One, four, five
One, four, five
One, four (yeah), five

Shit, I messed up again, why'd I ever say yes to this (one, four, five)?
Never not resettin' my list, this ain't fair, I hate to count heads (one, four, five)
Shit, I whiffed it again, lost track of the faces to check (one, four, five)
Erase all the checks on my list, this ain't fair, I hate to count heads (one, four, five)
Mmm, on the level: I would much rather be countin' petals (one, four, five)
I'd hate to look that judgmental but to volunteer for this job is mental (one, four, five)
Mmm, rather wrestle with both my inner and outer devils (one, four, five)
Why must you move? Friggin' settle, this whole "minglin'" thing is detrimental (yeah, yeah) (one, four, five)

Real small sandwiches in giant deliveries, your flash get-togethers are misery (one, four, five)
Don't want your cold cuts, want rotisserie, enough sugar to make me jittery (one, four, five)
Bad mood to start, hate all this frippery, dragged along through some heinous trickery (one, four, five)
Millin' around, not actin' busily so this stupid task is your gift to me (one, four, five)
Not a free pass to your stash of wine or a discount on a taxi ride (one, four, five)
No, it's busywork that no-one likes, makin' sure that ev'ryone arrived (one, four, five)
Ugh, all the ways that this ain't fair, ugh, like a traffic jam, piled there (one, four, five)
Ugh, you're the one guy I know here, ugh (yeah), now I must add all your friends there (one, four, five) (yeah)?

Shit, I messed up again, I should not have made a promise (one, four, five)
Stupid puppy-dog-eyes, I'm pissed, this ain't fair, I hate to count heads (one, four, five)
Shit, I whiffed it again, I don't know their names and they're pricks (one, four, five)
They don't wanna give 'em, so miffed, this ain't fair, I hate to count heads (one, four, five)
Mmm, on the level: I would much rather be eatin' nettles (one, four, five)
Might need to put on the kettle 'cause my energy's on submarine levels (one, four, five)
Mmm, got no pedal I could possibly put to the metal (one, four, five)
Why won't these fools ever settle in one friggin' room (yeah)? Think I might go mental (yeah) (one, four, five)

Legs hurt from runnin' 'round your dumb crib, all the rooms in this mansion feel like nonsense (one, four, five)
Seven bathrooms? Three kitchens? A tad redundant when it's only your ass that lives here, one twit (one, four, five)
It's a little bit distractin', to be honest but the bigger issue that I've got's this (one, four, five):
Ev'ryone is explorin', they cannot hold still and this list that you gave me is total horse swill (one, four, five)
It's just a stack of small flash-type cards, nobody's full name, told your ass before (one, four, five)
I know no-one, seven "Jacks" here, lord, this is dumb, hope my plan so far (one, four, five)
To guess at the hordes that you've brought in to scratch your floors (one, four, five)
All because you don't have the source invitations, how could that get borked (one, four, five)?

Ah, shit, I messed up again, ev'rybody's faces just blend (one, four, five)
So I can't just ignore the list, this ain't fair, I hate to count heads (one, four, five)
Shit, I whiffed it again, this feels like some hazin' bullshit (one, four, five)
The point of all this, I don't get, this ain't fair, I hate to count heads (one, four, five)
Mmm, on the level: I would much rather be drinkin' metal (one, four, five)
Can't see a good reason, sev'ral is way out of the question, want this settled (one, four, five)
Mmm, do you revel drivin' me nuts? Was that accidental (one, four, five)?
A real bad look, monumental, get me out of here 'fore I make you sterile (one, four, five)

One, four, five
One, four, five
One, four, five
One, four, five