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Song Parodies -> "Do French Me In"

Original Song Title:

"Don't Fence Me In"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Bing Crosby

Parody Song Title:

"Do French Me In"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Don't give me hand, logged I stand,
A sequoia spiked with love,
Do French me in.
Open wide like a bride;
Honeymoon-hovered above
Looms my wrenched limb.

I could beat on myself,
Give a pleasin' squeeze,
But now won't you murmur
And then cough a wood tease?
Get me off; I'm levered,
So I ask you, please,
Do French me in.

Let's turn it louche,
Treat me buccal, I'm unbuckled,
It's unsheathed, my gen'rous size.
Get that smile loose,
But don't maunder as you launder
It and mount over that rise.

And then just slide to the ridge
Where the crest commences,
And gape till I swoon
As my tube unclenches.
I dig like a shovel
Workin' wenches' trenches.
Do French me in.

Pucker, do French me in.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.3
How Funny: 3.9
Overall Rating: 3.9

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2
 2
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
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 4   1
 0
 0
 
 5   5
 5
 5
 

User Comments

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Johnny D - February 10, 2006 - Report this comment
This parody reminds me of Lord Flashheart's quip on "Black Adder" after he finished French-kissing Edmund's page-girl: "She's got a tongue like an electric eel, and she likes the taste of a MAN's tonsils!"
AFW - February 10, 2006 - Report this comment
Good job...sexy content...some great rhymes and lines in here..and it becomes sort of an answer song...to one I did last year, called "Don't French Me In"...except mine was a food parody..upper fives
alvin rhodes - February 10, 2006 - Report this comment
i'd give anything to hear bing sing this one
Rick C - February 10, 2006 - Report this comment
What alvin said.
Tommy Turtle - February 10, 2006 - Report this comment
A buccal' probably not do it; probably need at least a Twenty. The Turtle confesses that he was expecting a, um, different rhyme to follow "louche". Five of Bing's cherries.
John Barry - February 10, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks, JD, Alvin, Rick, AFW--I couldn't find "Don't French. . ."
AFW - February 10, 2006 - Report this comment
John: It came up when I ran "Search" for original song, "Don't Fence me In"....there's only three listed...it's written under an old pseudonym of mine, "Parody Pete"
John Barry - February 10, 2006 - Report this comment
No wonder I couldn't find it initially. I was looking in the AFW archive. Found it and see that I commented on it. What a memory I have, but then again, I can't remember some of the stuff I've done.
Max Power - February 10, 2006 - Report this comment
ROFL, good one dude.
wounded TT - February 10, 2006 - Report this comment
You didn't like my comment? (sniff) (sniff) oh well, given all the nice stuff ya said about my songs, I'll get over it.
John Barry - February 10, 2006 - Report this comment
TT, I had two other rhyme for "louche" in mind, both also French in origin and one of those related to "buccal." I did like your pun; I was buckled over with chuckles.
TT - February 10, 2006 - Report this comment
Douche'! oops, I mean, "Touche'!"
Larry Hensley - February 13, 2006 - Report this comment
Zees ees reely good. 5's

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