Song Parodies -> "(Squawkin' With A) Splinter In My Hand"

Original Song Title:

"Winter Wonderland"

Original Performer:

"(Squawkin' With A) Splinter In My Hand"

Parody Written by:

The Lyrics

Humans of the male persuasion can be such WIMPS!!

Piece of woodin my finger
At death's doorI will linger
This ain't no mild hurt,
It's worse than childbirth!
Squawkin' with a splinter in my hand

Woe is me...I see bleedin'!
SurgeryI'll be needin'
Prognosis, not great
They might amputate
Squawkin' with a splinter in my hand

I was haulin' timber like a real man
Then struck down by monstrous tragedy
I don't think the mental scars will heal, man
I'll need decades of psychotherapy!!

For my momI'll be bawlin'
911I'll be callin'
No will to be strong
It's 10 inches long!
Squawkin' with a splinter in my hand

Had a dose of flu in January
In July, a rash upon my bum
But these maladies weren't half as scary
As havin' half a log stuck in my thumb!

It's a freakin' disaster
Put my wholearm in plaster!
Sedation I need,
And a drip-feed
Squawkin' with a splinter in my hand
I'm a thirty seven year old man
Squawkin' with a splinter in my hand.

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Jeff Reuben - June 16, 2005 - Report this comment

Very nice, who wood have thought it?

Arwen - June 16, 2005 - Report this comment

LOL...nice work, Darling! But just go ahead and admit that you wrote the entire thing so that you could say "it's ten inches long!" without getting in trouble...; ) 5s...

Dee Range - June 16, 2005 - Report this comment

Woodn't it be spliced if they DO amputate? LMAO. 555

Rick C - June 16, 2005 - Report this comment

Lots of funny lines here, Kristof! Love it, love it.......5s

alvin rhodes - June 16, 2005 - Report this comment

fun to sing along with...5s

Stuart McArthur - June 16, 2005 - Report this comment

ha, perfectly done, as always, by the K-ster - the title match was a doozie, and I've gotta say that I agree with Arwen, Kristof - so transparent - 555

John Barry - June 16, 2005 - Report this comment

I got one a couple of days ago and acted just like these fine fives lyrics.

Red Ant - June 16, 2005 - Report this comment

Well, since everyone already ate up all the good puns and questions, I must ask this one: Did you type this parody with one hand? 5s all the same.

Kristof Robertson - June 16, 2005 - Report this comment

Thankyou Jeff, Arwen (*snigger*), Dee, Rick, Alvin, Stu and John. I actually posted this for yesterday...don't know why it's a day late. As for the 10 inches...I guess I'm just a bad, bad boy! Cheers...

AFW - June 16, 2005 - Report this comment

You're supposed to wear protection when you haul timber, Krisof...Like gloves, or something...This one was right down the middle..funny write..

Phil Alexander - June 16, 2005 - Report this comment

But I've had... an ideareal
To use it... as material
A parody song, so folks: sing along
Squawking with a splinter in my hand
;-) Yet more funny stuff, Kristof.

Adagio - June 16, 2005 - Report this comment

Cute one! 5's

Peter Andersson - June 16, 2005 - Report this comment

When I was a kid such splinters and their following wounds got me out of doing the dishes and such. Funny, I had them all the time, and the wound never seemed to heal... :-)

Kristof Robertson - June 17, 2005 - Report this comment

Red Ant:I did it with my toes........AFW: Sheesh, I shoulda known that!;-)........Phil: Ideareal?? ;-) Cheers, mate..........Adagio: Thanks, sweetie...........Peter: You clever Scandinavian, you!....bye!

Tim Mayfield - June 17, 2005 - Report this comment

I don't have problems with the big splinters, it's the ones you don't see that irritate and annoy. Fives?? Fives?? We don't give no stickin' Fives!! (yes we did)

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