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Song Parodies -> "Snappier Than Ever"

Original Song Title:

"Happier Than Ever"

Original Performer:

Billie Eilish

Parody Song Title:

"Snappier Than Ever"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

You put something under enough pressure, eventually the levee's gonna give way. This especially applies to retail workers...
I've had no breaks, it's true, I'm snappier than ever
My mouth filter has been severed, my sentences are crude
Give me a day or two to have my brain remember
That though I may feel bitter, I can't just let it loose, mmm-mmm

Longer my shift continues, the more (the more) that it wears down my fuse (wears down my fuse)
I know (I know) I come off as a douche, out of context, I must say
All the customers that you (customers that you) have heard relayin' what I said, it's true
But their obnoxiousness harshened my attitude (harshed my attitude) and it's been like that all day
It really isn't fair, I know you were aware that I was irritable
It's not that I "can't take a joke"

I've had no breaks, it's true (not had a break, it's true)
I'm snappier than ever (snappier than ever)
All those words, I swear I'd never (swear upon my heart I'd never)
Normally let them loose, mm-mmm

I'm sorry I flipped but I'd had it
I never wanted to lose my shit
But I'm at the end of my rope, it won't mend
'Til I have the breather my contract promised
I won't explain to you
I won't explain to you, no
The details all nitty and gritty
Of why I acted shitty

'Cause I have no wind in my sails, I'm all out of breath
Workin' so hard my lungs almost collapsed
Just scannin' in ev'rything, recitin' up-selling
My feet drown in sweat, why must our shoes be black?
I know what broke me wasn't bad
The old standard "check in the back"
Ev'rybody's sick of that line, we hear it all the time
But after a thousand times, the strongest would flip
You can dock enough pay that I won't make my rent on time
Just know that it was you that forced me to it

You always tell us that good
Workers need no time off, doubt you could
Take all the bollocks, you know
You worked the front? Don't think so, yeah-eah-eah-eah

Apparently there's a bunch of screaming swear words at the end of this song, but they're so buried in the mix that it'd do my head in just transcribing it. Probably wouldn't change that much in the new context, though.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 4.9
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 15

Voting Breakdown

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   1
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 4   0
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 5   14
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