Intro]
Oh, my, god. Emily, look at it's tail!
It's so fluffy *scoff* He looks like
One of those ninja guys' mascots
But, y'know, who understands those Ninja guys? *scoff*
They only talk to him, because
He looks like a total squirrel, 'kay?
I mean, his tail is just so big *scoff*
I can't believe it's so fuzzy, it's like,
Out there. I mean—gross. Look!
He's just so...gray!

[Sir Eats-Nuts-A-Lot]
I like sexy squirrels and I cannot lie
You rad ninjas can't deny
When a squirrel bounds in with an
Itty-bitty nose and a bushy tail in
Your face, you get sprung,
Wanna *ahem* that squirrel
'Cause you noticed that squirrel is buff
Deep in the fur he's wearing

I'm hooked and I can't stop staring
Oh, squirrlie, I wanna get wit'cha
And take your picture
My friends all tried to warn me
But that tail you get makes me feel so warm-y
Ooh, Tail-o'-Fuzzy-Fur.
You say you wanna run up my pant leg?
Well, use me, use me
Cuz you aint that average fanboy
I've seen you prancin'
The hell with ugly Putin
Squirrlie's got to see the vet
Got it going like an awesome pet
I'm tired of those magazines
Saying chipmunks are the thing.
Take the average ninja and ask him that.
He's gotta have a bushy tail.
So ninjas! (yeah!) Ninjas! (yeah!)
Has your squirrlie got the tail? (Hell yeah!)
Tell 'em to shake it! (shake it!) Shake it! (shake it!)
Shake that bushy tail.
Squirrlie got tail.

I like 'em bushy and big,
And when I'm eating a fig
I just can't help myself, I'm acting like a squirrel
Now here's my sandal
You can come home
And, ugh, chew it up, ugh, ugh
I aint talkin' bout chipmunks
'Cause buck-teeth are made for beavers
I want 'em real fat and fuzzy
So show me that bushy tail
Legolas's in trouble,
Beggin' for a piece of your acorn
So I'm lookin' at other rodents,
Watchin' these chipmunks scampering
Like weasels
You can have them bimbos,

I'll keep my squirrlies right here, yo.
A word to my thick-tailed brothas,
I wanna get with ya.
I won't shoot or trap ya.
But I gotta be "straight" when I say
I wanna "have luck" till the break of dawn
Squirrlie got it goin' on.
A lot of pimps won't like this song,
'Cause squirrels like to fight 'em and bite 'em
And I'd rather play with squirrels.
'Cause their tails are long,
And I'm strong,
And that just sounded wrong.
So squirrlies (yeah!)
Squirrlies (yeah!)
If you wanna forget the ladies,
Then turn around! Stick it out!
Even Max Perry's gotta shout,
Squirrlie got tail. Squrrlie got tail.

Yeah, squirrlie, when it comes to females
They don't got no tails
So I don't like 'em
But look at my tail!

So your girlfriend likes to dance
Playin' rock videos by Davey
But Davey aint got a tail
In the back of his pants.
The ninjas don't want none
Unless you've got a tail, hun
You can climb trees and jump
But please swish that sexy tail
Some ninjas wanna be squirrels too
And tell you that your tail is cool
So you twitch it, and flick it
And I really like it
So Emily says you're cute
And you're small and fuzzy to boot
'Cause your body is small

And your tail is huge
And I'm thinkin' 'bout you-ge
To the slutty chimpmunks in the magazines
Their tails are way too lean
Give me a squirrel, can't resist him
Nuts and twigs didn't miss him
Some NOMS guy tried to dis
'Cause squirrels aren't on his list
He was lame so he tried to squish 'em
And I pulled up quick and hit him.
So squirrlies, if the tail is big,
And you want a rocket science "demo"
Dial 1-900-ILUVYOU
And kick Max Perry in the crotch
Squirrlie got tail!