I don't care a lot for Christmas
"Seasons Greetings" cause me pain
I see adverts in September
And think "Oh, no.. not again"
I just totally despise
How it's all commercialized
No, I won't play ball:
I do not want Christmas at all

I don't give a s**t for Christmas
Thank god it's just once a year
I hate all the phoney goodwill
False bonhomie and fake cheer
I hate hearing Christmas carols
Every hour that I'm awake
Watching TV, this tune's playing
Every damn commercial break
Never-ending stream on tap
Tacky ads for plastic pap,
Food and alcohol
I do not want Christmas at all


I don't want a jot for Christmas
No presents in a deluge
Realize my Christmas role-
Model is Ebeneezer Scrooge
You might say that I'm a killjoy
'Cause I don't like Christmas fun
And it may be true, but still I
Bet I'm not the only one
Emails with Christmas spam
Going on ad nauseam
Time slows to a crawl
I do not want Christmas at all


All the lights are shining
So brightly everywhere
Think of all the CO2
Pumped into the air
All this bloody singing
Sets my ears ringing
Santa, just forget the Yuletide cup
Won't you please, please! PLEASE! all shut the f*** up

I should get away for Christmas
Head off somewhere nice and hot
Spending Christams in Iraq
Has an attraction.. maybe not
Pakistan sound good to me
Anybody here got free
Tickets to Nepal?
Because
I DO NOT WANT CHRISTMAS AT ALL