Might call them tennis shoes, prefer the "sneakers" name
'Cause I'd rather not dwell upon the truth that's my lack of sporting skill, deep shame
With the balls, not handy, I can't serve at all, trust me
Yeah, either whiff with the racquet or I'm just taking out someone's teeth

I'm real awful at tennis
So awful, I won't see Wimbledon for real
Awful at tennis
It's honestly unreal, my garbage deal

If it's you who serves it, I will still end up screwed
Could gently lob, I'm still gonna miss it, won't see it come back to you
But at least I'm not the archetypal workman who just blames his tools
It's not the racquet that is shit, not the court or net, it's me who is the fool

Because I'm awful at tennis
I'm so awful, I won't beat Williams for real
Awful at tennis
My luck is so unreal, what is the deal?

I would train if I was able
To book anyone, not fair
One racquet careens into the main booth now I'm banned from ev'rywhere
Man, I don't have a prayer at tennis

You say I should stick to doubles? Sorry, I just can't see why I would
Won't bring someone down forever to my level, that ain't good
Adds one more, wait, two people for my ass to flail at, right
Hit my partner with a backhanded strike, opponents hit ricochet style

Awful at tennis (awful at tennis)
I'm so awful, coach might need therapy for real (oh-whoa-whoa)
Awful at tennis (awful at tennis)
My lack of skill's unreal, got a bad deal
Awful at tennis (awful at tennis)
I'm so awful, gold trophy's a pipe dream for real (oh-whoa-whoa)
Awful at tennis (awful at tennis)
Just watch me, it's unreal, how do I deal?

You ask me why I choose to put myself through pain
And play though I'm bad, I'd be right with you, if I had the choice, I'd never play
But until this racquet breaks, I refuse to not get my money's worth, insane