Hey, Goliath
Your album was bullshit
Hosting it for the center of town
And if you be so nice
I'll buy you Stained Class

Hey, Janet
Your album was brilliant
Holding it in the toilet seat for me
And if you look very cold
I'll buy you American Idiot
Not Houses Of The Holy

Superman never made any money
He just took U2 out of iTunes
And this time you had to pay for it
I was listening to Reef
Also was chilling to Suede

Goliath, then
Your family were all dead
Your albums were this shit
And worse than Definitely Maybe
And better than Slanted And Enchanted

You were my favourite shit
Favourite shit still upon us
Superman wasn't made any money
He was a tosser to all of us even Janet
And sometimes when he's angry
I'll buy him, Thriller

Hey lord
Your Deep Purple was good fun
I prefer it if you delete 'Burn'
But not 'Hush'
Hey Goliath
Your Counting Crows was good fun
I prefer it if you delete 'Daylight Fading'
Not 'A Long December'

Superman never made any money
He just took Ireland down on his knees
And he wasn't like that
Wasn't like that after all

Superman never made any money
He just took Scotland up on his knees
And he wasn't Glaswegian
Neither was he from Dundee