You can squeeze your squirrel,
Pretend that it's a girl
Dress it in a skirt, do role plays
Or, you can hug your ape,
Get kinky with a grape
And hang out with your horse for days and days

You can goose your goose,
Or mess with your pet moose
Ride your potgut pig across the floor
And you can snug your cat,
Be cuddly with your rat,
But you can't kiss those chickens anymore..

No, don't lick that chick, that icky sicky chick
Just watch the news, you'll understand
That if you kiss your chick, you'll catch a germ to stick
Spread Salmonella 'cross the land
(oooo)

You can press your pooch,
Give your big snake a smooch
Or tease your Pekinese and make him beg
Neck with your giraffe,
And shower with your calf
Or let your little schnauzer hump your leg

Then have your Aunt Louise,
Can spray you for the fleas
Go back and get your pets and play and play
But be a little wise,
With chickens, gals and guys
Old Salmonella bug is loose, today

So, don't kiss that chick, that icky sicky chick
You'll activate your insur'nce plan
No, don't lip that bird, Stay Healthy is the word
Knock Salmonella on it's can..
(oooo)

No, don't peck that fowl,
Be firm like Simon Cowell
Hos-pital rooms aren't in demand
Do not french that chick,
It's beak'll make you sick
Buy KFC and lick your hand..

Just buy KFC and lick your hand..