You can eat my cake, or eat my Cadbury Flake
You can scarf my cookies while I’m gone
Or you can call your friends, food supplies never end
Invite them to eat me from house and home

Or Barbecue my meat, when cooked, nice to eat
You can clean the griller of its fat
A moment on the lips, a lifetime on the hips
While at it, you can even eat the cat

But don't eat my tart, my butter custard tart
I cannot get my money back
And if you eat my tart, my butter custard tart
I might just have a heart attack

You can eat my socks, or gobble down my jocks
You can eat the neighbors’ concrete walls
Or take a holiday, don’t eat tyres on the way
And drink the water from Niagara Falls

Or have my DVD’s, do with them as you please
Don’t care if they’re for stomach or for eyes
Oh just listen to me, now I’m being silly
I know you want to eat my pies

Don’t eat my tart, my butter custard tart
I bought it especially for me
And if you eat my tart, my butter custard tart
You might not watch no more TV

Don’t eat my tart, my butter custard tart
What part did you not understand?
And if you eat my tart, my butter custard tart
I only hope you washed your hands

Don't tell my heart, my achy breaky heart
Now I’ve been going on too long
And if you eat my tart, my butter custard tart
I might repeat this stupid song