Here we are, placing orders for our burgers
From your car, while nutritional researchers
Tell us that fat is bad, we should eat right, have something light
And they say they want to banish fries
Healthy food will keep us all alive
But they’re trampling on our human rights
I can eat just what I choose
And I’ll wash it down with booze
Maybe have dessert – how about some cherry pie
They might want us all to eat
Vegetables instead of meat
But I won’t let them complete their plans to banish fries

Even though we’re a land of overeaters
And I know we drink soda by the liter
How can they say to us that we must exclude
All deep fried food
And we should agree to banish fries
Instead I think that I will supersize
And although my blood pressure’s soaring high
I’ll just take another pill
And I’ll say “I think I will”
When you offer me corn dogs piled to the sky
And I’ll have to take a stand
If they try to make a ban
I’ll oppose their plan to have the congress banish fries

Don’t mind their opinions but they’ve really gone too far
I guess that next they’ll ban my cigar
If they do succeed to banish fries
And the world is so full of folks who pry
They just stick their noses in
Try to tell me it’s a sin
When I’m having fun munching on the foods I like
Their intentions may be good
And their tactics ballyhooed
But our liberty should trump their scheme to banish fries

And if there comes a day
When they take my fries away
I’ll open a café
And stock up on supplies
And I’ll offer something new
I’ll call it spud fondue
Yes it’s true, if they ever banish fries