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Song Parodies -> "I Eat Lunchables"

Original Song Title:

"I Eat Cannibals"

Original Performer:

Toto Coelo

Parody Song Title:

"I Eat Lunchables"

Parody Written by:

Merry & Pippin

The Lyrics

Since Kraft Lunchables has been in the news lately with the trans fat controversy and fast food lawsuits pending...
I eat Lunchables, crackers crunchable
It all is so snackable to me, I eat Lunchables
Polyunsaturate, it's that bad trans fat
It brings out obesity in me; all those Lunchables

What can I do, I grew and grew
Fat gut, blowing up, it's never gonna stop
Lunchtime meat bites, big appetites, yum yum on a bun
Then I want another one

Take them to my school, Kraft says they're so cool
They taste so delectable to me, all those Lunchables
Tho' I'm just 13, weight's grown quite obscene
I need exercisable machine, blame those Lunchables

Mom's so daft, trusting in Kraft
There's no vitamin, I should be dietin'
Mmmm munch that cheese, can't see my knees
Pack of M&Ms, I'm so glad they snuck those in

What I wanna do, is eat them till I spew
Eat twenty packs a week, I can't find my feet
When it comes to push and shove
(Reflux, hock it up, I wish that I could stop)
Won't ever tire of
(Yum, yum, gee it's fun, I'm filling up my tum)
I am not alone
(What's thin? fat is in, don't need no dieting)
We are all Kraft drones
(I eat Lunchablllllles)

B'lieve that commercial, Kraft would not me fool
Those kids look so credible to me, with their Lunchables
See their happy smiles, on school bus they pile
Kraft preys on the consumer in me, with their Lunchables

Suck that juice in, my belt is not loos'nin'
Eat one, eat two; trans fat is good for you
Set a trial date, lawyers have a field day
Forsake good steak, we'll be so sad at your wake

Sue Kraft, fast food, then sue all the parents too
To our dismay, have to be towed away
Make no mistake, big fat kids this stuff does make
Eat till you drop, waist line is gonna pop

(fade)

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.4
How Funny: 4.3
Overall Rating: 4.3

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   6
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User Comments

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Under Pressure - July 09, 2003 - Report this comment
Love it!
Tim Hall - July 10, 2003 - Report this comment
Nice job. BTW, I also have another food parody titled "What The Country Needs is Less Fast Food"
mandamoo - July 11, 2003 - Report this comment
I'm having visions of the fat guy in 'The Meaning Of Life'............eeeerrhhgg....! Excellent once again !
Tim Hall - July 27, 2005 - Report this comment
I was looking at my Eat A Lot Of Fat Every Day parody again and one of the comments was from you recommending this parody to me. i read it and it still was quite funny
Peter Carmichael - March 04, 2011 - Report this comment
Amazing! Love it A+++++

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This is view # 2003