i bought it in a bar down in old soho
where theres no champagne, all they sell is co-co-co-cola
c-o-l-a cola
the taste in my mouth made me jump up and dance
the bouncer asked for my name and in a bubbly voice i said cola
c-o-l-a cola co-co-co-coka cola

now my tolerance for alcohol is not high
so i drink coke to keep a really stiff spine
oh my coka. co-co-co-co cola
well i'm not dumb but i can't understand
why i talk like a guy but drink like women
oh my coka. co-co-co-co cola.

i drank my coke and danced all night
and once i even had a sprite
i slid across the floor on just my knees
and got the drunk girls to come home with me
well i'm not the worlds most passionate guy
and when i looked at her thighs i wished i'd drank more than cola
co-co-co-co cola co-co-co-co cola
co-co-co-co cola co-co-co-co cola
i pushed her away
i walked out the door
and fell to the floor
i begged, oh, please
why did i look at her and she at me?

and thats the way that i want it to stay
and i always want to drink that way
just my coka. co co co co cola.
there will be rum and there will be coke
its a mixed up muddled up shook up joke
i drink my cola. co co co co cola.

wel i'd left home just a week before
and i'd never ever had a drink before
i sat with my cola in my hand
and said 'add the rum and make me a man!!'

well i'm not a crazy drunken yollder
i know what i am, i a tea-totaller
i'll stick to cola
co-co-co-co cola co-co-co-co cola
co-co-co-co cola co-co-co-co cola