Can't avoid this scene
Cause you need, hey, much more you see
You could be, ha, makin' more money
Could be, yeah, makin' more money

You come here nine to five, that's what you get paid for (ha, ha)
Arrive before (yeah) so the time you work's more (huh, huh)
What, extra pay? Oh, please, that's not why you're here, you dweeb
Can't avoid (uh) this scene (whoo!), you need much more, you see (yeah)
Could be, yeah, makin' more money
Could be, yeah, makin' more money
Addin' much more to the bottom line, this company
Needs you here to be workin' constantly (no pause)
The profits you earn (uh, ha) for us will be (ha-ha)
Handed down to you, well, eventually (huh)
So get to work early and we will be pleased (ha)
Your customer line gets too long? I see
No efficiency, that's the issue, I guess
We can't open more lines, that's not advantageous
No, you need to be faster, don't think you're slow
We've monitored your pace, not snail-like, you know
Just needs to be upped, boosted a tad
Pretend you're Sonic crossbred with The Flash (ah-ha, ha)
I've heard they're (ha) popular shows or maybe a game
I'm tryna empathise with someone not my age
You're a kid, I'm not
Can't avoid (ha, ha) the awkwardness, right
So if I seem (whoo!) like I know what you like (ha-ha)
That might blast through the vague legality, might
Said that out loud? Lies, did not hear right
What you just heard was the choice media that I like
So maybe (ha-ha), and so maybe (ha-ha, ha-ha)
You just may be (ha) lookin' lazy (yeah, whoo!)
Here's a tip, listen to the man with your job in his hands now:
I don't care if you need breaks to sit down
I'm sure your thighs need a little thigh rest
But take your feet pain, how your legs bleed (lotta blood, ha)
Ignore it, dude, just like what I do
When you bring up that your whole entire crew
They kinda dropped (ha, yeah), they straight up and flopped (ha-ha, ha-ha)
And that may sound real heinous (ha, yeah) but when on the clock (whoo!)
While I'm the C-E-damn-O, the big head cheese (yeah)
You do what I said, I'm that not-hard to please
There's no real need to think you're human
You're a wage drone, see (whoo!), pretend that's literal
And I'm not K-I-double-D-I-N-G
You want your pay? Then please do it for me
You stand up for work, ignore your knees
And you can't leave (heard me, y'all), got more words in my screed (ha-ha, ha)
That maybe, a-just maybe (ha, ha, ha)
You might think are nice, they're so, so nice
Yes, a compliment, just maybe, is in the pipeline (ha, yeah, right)
You'll have to wait, man, I'm afraid there's more
You'll have to listen to me rant some more
'Round 'bout half of you jerks on the sales floor (you all)
Suck hard, what do you (yeah) all get paid for?
Must up that score, you're kinda weak, HUH!
Can't avoid this scene, you need much more, you see
You could be, yeah, makin' more money
Could be, yeah, makin' more money

Your work is fine, need to up the pace
Remember your real, proper place
Worker, show me what you got
Ha, huh, huh, yeah, ha-ha, ha
Whoo! Yeah
Work hard
Ha, huh, yeah
Huh, yeah, keep on that

One little foible that you have (yeah, oh yeah)
When customers lose their shit, flip their lid, blow their stack (yeah, huh)
It's a known fact that you can never react
Even if they pelt you with sharp tacks (tacks)
Or pull a cricket bat from their purse or their ass
Well, you're gonna have to stand there 'til the guards react (ah-ha)
You need to chill out, we can't have you snap
Cause it will never, ever, ever, ever look good, man (whoo! Yeah, uh)
Need to stay cool, stay calm, will only do harm (uh-huh, huh)
If you dare ask "please don't do that", hurts hard
When people see the way you go and freak (yeah, yeah)
And disrespect the requests they speak
Cause you're not here to turn them all down
It's not your place to chuck them all out
They may be naked now (uh) and throwin' eggs and rocks (uh-huh)
It's best to take their abuse like you take mine, so stop
Look, you'll be fine in a minute, sev'ral minutes, be fine (fine, ha)
Just keep on clockin' (ha) in, don't call in sick, right
Your leave is for when you need it, say you need it? Well, what for (ha, whoo!)?
You can still clock in if your whole self's sore
Yes, yes, all of this sounds off (say what)
Just because nobody told you 'bout it, you're still wrong
Now, let me tell you a story 'bout what you're (uh) paid for
Workin' nine-to-five, huge list of chores
Have you ever played DK64, dude (ha, ha)?
Collectin' crap 'til your thumbs turned blue
Well, all the things that game made you do
Jack-all compared to what I have, true
Restockin' overnight, makin' the shelves neat
Help all the stupid people find the canned beets
No time to practice cause while practice might make you good (say what)
Cuts right into our profits like the sharpest hook (ha-ha, ha)
Have you got enough time? I kid, you do not
You've got to be fleet, but don't rush lots
Because, man, if you rush things, truth be told
You'll make me look real lazy, not in control (huh)
You see, us manager types, the top of the pile (hahahahahahahaha)
"Stay out of sight" is our usual style (hahahahahahahaha)
When things are not right, we are deployed (yeah)
To make things aligned for the peasant hordes (say what?)
Feels like you're mockin' me (whoo! Ha), you mock my need (haha)
To feel that I've earned my stacks of green (you should know that)
See my checks? Makin' more money (hahahaha)
Than a pleb like you could ever dream
So I must squash the opportunity (yes)
That you peasants might have to look like you do need
Some more dosh (whoo!) than what you've got (oh)
Wage proportionately raised to match the workload? Wrong
So stop all of these meetups, not okay
You're not worth more than two bucks a day
I say you're lucky that I give you any cash
One more damn union, wages are halved
Well, that was a screed, I'm sorry I
Let that out, hope you'll find I'm not that mean, right
You're not paid for all this rantin', son (haha)
Let's move fast to what I really want
To talk 'bout, see, for the company
You still could be makin' way more money
Won't let that pin drop, just move on-on-on
Shit, no pin drop, I don't want
You takin' days off, you see (ha), no more bein' on call (ha, ha)
You takin' days off, you see, is a real pain in the ass (huh)
Need a helpful guy always on tap with no lag
So be at work (whoo!) the whole damn week long
You'll get more pay (whoo!), that's what you want
Right? It's true, get used to wake-up time at five
Or, wait, did you forget the first damn point of mine?
Want you to start your work two hours before (say)
Neither of which you will get paid for
What? No plans to speak with all your mates (ha)
They're doin' fine, schedules will remain
I'm not just pickin' on you, that's a no
Just hopin' very much (huh) you'll become a pro (ha, uh)
So that you'll get paid for much more, you see (HUH!)
Can't avoid this scene, you need, much more, you see
You could be makin' more money
Could be, yeah, makin' more money

Man, your jaw's real slack, kinda awkward
Man, your jaw's real slack, a-come on, a-come on
Man, your jaw's real slack, that seems a bit off
Man, your jaw's real slack, close it, please, cause
My big plan is real basic, you've got room to improve, this
All must be cause, you see, you're jealous of the clout I get
I get paid for the things I've done to please the fat cat owners
While you're (ha) simply (haha) a base (ha) peon, how's that there for some full disclosure?
Brain goes ooh, ah, ooh-ooh, ooh-ah, ah
Because it's bangin' on rocks (yeah)
Because it's bangin' on little rocks, bangin' on little rocks (ha)
Because it's bangin' on rocks (ha, haha)
Because it's bangin' on little rocks (whoo! Yeah), bangin' on little rocks (yeah)
Because it's bangin' on rocks
Come on, hear me out, come on, hear me out
Should be paid for huntin' mammoths, your skills are in doubt

No, you're not paid for this meetin' board
Expectin' more than what you're workin' for
You clocked in, but, you see, I own you, so no more green
Can't avoid this scene, you need much more, you see
Yeah, you still could be (ha, ha) uppin' your speed (ha, yeah)
So (whoo!) that I'm makin' more money (haha)
Wanna quit, man? That's a laugh, 'cause I know you know
You got played for what you signed, 'fraid so
Good luck tryna find work, because you will find
You're blackballed, no-one will sympathise
Bet you'll swear *beep-beep-beep-b-beep-b-b-b-b-beep*
That's checkin' out, that's checkin' out (beep-beep-b-beep-b-beep)
Bet you'll swear, "Shit" and then "Shit" and then one more "Shit"
The swear's will fly out uh, uh, a-uh, bee-beep (and one more "Shit", "Shit", then "Shit", then "Shit")
The swears won't drip-drip-drop, they'll zoom on-on-on
Because you're pissed off cause you've lost
A-well, it's time to go, yes, the golf course calls so
But before I go (hey), I just want to learn and know
Why you simply smiled (ha, haha) at all that I (ha)
Said, wait, oh Lord, lemme guess right here, you never signed
And all the sounds that I hear, sounds that I do fear (whoo!)
You laugh, oh dear, you're headin' out of here
Now I'll swear *beep-beep-beep-b-beep-b-b-b-b-beep*
That's checkin' out, that's checkin' out (beep-beep-b-beep-b-beep)
Now I'll swear, "Shit" and then "Shit" and then one more "Shit"
The swear's will fly out uh, uh, a-uh, bee-beep (and one more "Shit", "Shit", then "Shit", then "Shit")
Afraid that's che-che-che-ch-checkin' out (stop, please stop, please stop, please stop)
Afraid that's che-che-che-ch-checkin' out (oh, please stop, please stop, please stop, please stop)
Afraid that's che-che-che-ch-checkin' out (oh, please stop, please stop, please stop, please stop, stop)
Afraid that's che-che-che-ch-checkin' out (oh, please stop, please stop, please stop, please stop, stop, stop)
[fades out into incomprehensible gibberish)