My mate.. says 'cause I'm overweight
In a state, unfit.. looking gross, feeling shit

I'm eating chocolate - putting on a load o' fat
Got a big waistline, I'm bending space-time
Gravity is all mine, grunt, no, strength,
The batter doesn't matter with a calorie count, that's
Higher'n a fryer, full of full-fat Mars bars
And a body feeling dire like a wombat shite
Heavy body never in a hurry as I wobble-bobble
What the heck?

You see me, floppy-bottomed, waddle toddle walk
Look at you - piss-take, fine, then
Uh oh, overflow, can you see yourself grow
But it'll do, feed yourself, stuff yourself
Overdone our own greed, I know what we both need
Anaerobic exercise, burning off the french fries
You despising, patronising, won't run, won't fight
Am I doing right?

I'm attending a class in aerobics
It's a blend of high farce and heroics
And I'll end on my arse, and I know it... I won't whine

Six o'clock, T.V. dinner, is my butt getting thinner
Got the urge, regurg- itating the last splurge
Can't fit in uniform, bulimic, no gimmick
Every muscle will vibrate, spare tyre oscillate
Pushing right, pushing left, stretch up, stretch down
Bend my knees, creak, creak, uh oh
Am I a backyard old guard, retard in a leotard
It's punishment, it's punishment this bloody exercise
Giving out pollution, giving out that CO2 as I recline

I'm attending a class in aerobics
I'm distending my arse, but I'm stoic
My rear end's way too vast, and I know it... waste of time

I'm attending a class in aerobics (It's time I lost some weight, you know)
I suspend disbelief as I go, it (It's time you lost some weight, you know)
Will be ending of me, and I know it and I resign (It's time we lost some weight, you know)


The other night I dreamt o' nice continental cheese and wine
Piles of food in a line, cooked by Rick Stein
Blumenthal, Masterchef, Jamie Bloody Oliver
Birthday nibbles, cheesecake, jellybean, FOOD!
You narcissistic, parasitic, thin but heck! Night, Night!

I'm attending a class in aerobics (It's time I lost some weight, you know)
Just pretend to squeeze past and don't blow it (It's time you lost some weight, you know)
I will send for some fast food, and bro' it tastes real fine (It's time we lost some weight, we're gross)

I'm attending a class in aerobics
It's a blend of high farce and heroics
As I end on my arse, and I know it... I won't whine

(It's time I lost some weight, I know)