Ah, some stuff online's lasted a while, ah
Some of it's great and some is vile, ah
It feels so rude when it gets revealed, ah
That your fav'rite site went and congealed
Ain't gold, ah, ain't gold, scrub your soul clean, ah, not right

Ah, so if you choose: relive your teens, ah
Prepare for stuff to not be sweet, ah
I'm warnin' you to keep hold of doubts, ah
That it'll age, like fine wine now, ah
Try not to feel like a dimwit at the things you chose to view, ah
'Cause you were only a young'un and the future can be rude

Now know it's bad, it's bad (bad, bad), ain't gold, ah (pretty, pretty bad)
Turns out it's bad, it's bad (bad, bad), it's bogus, ah (pretty, pretty bad)
To know it's bad, it's bad (bad, bad), ain't gold, it blows (pretty, pretty bad)
Not a whole lot one can do but groan loud as you're sufferin' through it
It's bad

Oh-oh
Oh-oh, ah, ah

Don't double-down, ah, and watch through it all, ah
You'll want to wash both your eyeballs, ah
Whether you find the green screen's shite, ah
The actin' chops, are Wiseau-lite, ah
Or if you see or hear a man, ah
Usin' words known to get one canned, ah
You can say the past is diff'rent and it's really clear that's true, ah
But that doesn't mean the content won't destroy nostalgia too

'Cause now it's bad, it's bad (bad, bad), ain't gold, ah (pretty, pretty bad)
Was always bad, it's bad (bad, bad), feels bogus, ah (pretty, pretty bad)
To learn it's bad, it's bad (bad, bad), so bullshit, that blows (pretty, pretty bad)
An unendin' string of -isms, I've found that "yikes" is a word that fits
It's bad

Oh-oh, oh-oh
Oh-oh

Ah, not all doom and gloom, you follow? Some have charm in how they're lame, ah
Either way, rewatch is takin' the rose glasses off your face

Now know it's bad, it's bad (bad, bad), ain't gold, ah (pretty, pretty bad)
Turns out it's bad, it's bad (bad, bad), it's bogus, ah (pretty, pretty bad)
To know it's bad, it's bad (bad, bad), it feels awkward, it blows (pretty, pretty bad)
Hate the test of time (hoo) whenever it's found (hoo) to have aged somethin' (hoo) like milk
'Cause now it's bad, it's bad (bad, bad), ain't gold, ah (pretty, pretty bad)
Was always bad, it's bad (bad, bad), feels bogus, so bogus (pretty, pretty bad)
That blows, that blows (bad, bad), that blows, ain't gold (pretty, pretty bad)
What I'm tryin' my best to dodge right now, the whole "modern standards" bit (ah)
Although it's true it's bad (bad, bad), it's bogus, ah (pretty, pretty bad)
Turns out it's bad (bad, bad), so bad, buddy, ah (pretty, pretty bad)
It blows, it blows (bad, bad), it's bogus, ain't gold (pretty, pretty bad)
Got the "okay for the time" speech nailed now but my eyes (hoo) will not untwitch
'Cause now it's bad, it's bad (bad, bad), so bogus, ah (pretty, pretty bad)
Was always bad, it blows (bad, bad), whoo, ah (pretty, pretty bad)
Clear that it's bad, it's bad (bad, bad), so bullshit, that blows (pretty, pretty bad)
Second-hand embarrassment, I might drown in, I'm filled with much regret
It's bad