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Song Parodies -> "Houri Virgins"

Original Song Title:

"Like A Virgin"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Madonna

Parody Song Title:

"Houri Virgins"

Parody Written by:

Steve Kalafut

The Lyrics

The contrast between the afterlife as imagined by radical Muslim terrorists, and the afterlife that all terrorists deserve. Although a "houri" is untouched by man, and is thus virginal, the term does not translate as "virgin", but more like "pure being". "Kaffir" is used by Muslims to denote infidels (and by white settlers in Africa as a racial slur against the black natives). "Iblis" is the Islamic name of the supreme devil (and later a character on the old Battlestar Galactica TV series).
I want to kill the infidels
As many as I can
Blow them all to smithereens
That's Osama's plan

When my act is complete
I'll be dead, but I won't be blue
'Cause then I'll be with
Yes, I'll soon be with
Seventy two

Houri virgins
Touched for the very first time
All those virgins
In the next world
They're all mine

Gonna give the infidels terror
Their fear is rising fast
Been craving a martyr's death
Not much more to last

They're so fine and they're mine
Must be strong, for the task ahead
They are my reward
Yes, they're my reward
When kaffirs are dead

Houri virgins
Touched for the very first time
All those virgins
In the next world
They're all mine

Oooh, oooh, oooh
[sound of explosion]

Now I'm here and I fear
I'm in brimstone up to my ears
Something is not right
And it's come to light
Boy, it's hot down here

Where's my virgins?
There's only perverts and whores
There's no virgins
And my skin now
Crawls with sores

There's no virgins, ooh, ooh
Just insurgents
They've come down here, too
Did you kill them, all the pagans, and crusaders?

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Ooh, Iblis
Am I really stuck here
'Til the end of all time?

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   3
 3
 3
 

User Comments

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John Barry - February 01, 2006 - Report this comment
Ah, the irony. A song about genocidal terrorists set to the music of the supreme intepreter of the Cabala. Fine fives.
Royce Miller - February 01, 2006 - Report this comment
Second set of fives is from me.
Agrimorfee - February 01, 2006 - Report this comment
Reminds me of the Onion's post-9/11 issue where the terrorists were disappointed in their final destination of Hell, instead of the blessings of heaven they were hoping for (the fools). S'alaam alaikem...555

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