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Song Parodies -> "Wore a Merkin"
Original Song Title:
"Like a Virgin"
(MP3)Original Performer:
Madonna
Parody Song Title:
"Wore a Merkin"
Parody Written by:
Robert D. Arndt Jr.
The Lyrics
mer·kin
ˈmərkən
noun
an artificial covering of hair for the pubic area.
ˈmərkən
noun
an artificial covering of hair for the pubic area.
Part of the movie business
Actresses in the nude
When the camera pans down
Don't want to see real pubes
The rug's neat and complete
Like a pad, not bad, stuck with glue
No, it doesn't look real
Gives a girl an "Indian" feel, or
Au natural!
(Chorus)
Wore a merkin
On film for the very first time
Wore a merkin
Full frontal showin'
No vagine...
Yes, wore the rug, boys
Honeypot to mask
Carpet in plain view
One for each lass!
Hair so fine, squiggly lines
Looks all wrong, as the scenes unfold
Compared to topless shots
Which are always hot
But then down to triangles!
(Chorus)
Oooh, oooh, oooh
It's a crime and a lie
Furry piece of threaded pie
No, it's not real
Has a rough feel
Some are glued, others tied...
(Chorus)
Wore a merkin, not smooth
Wore a merkin
Looks bad on the outside
It's so furry, and so ugly, like in the '70s!
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Drives me crazy
TV does modern nude scenes, where
Rug's not applied...
Actresses in the nude
When the camera pans down
Don't want to see real pubes
The rug's neat and complete
Like a pad, not bad, stuck with glue
No, it doesn't look real
Gives a girl an "Indian" feel, or
Au natural!
(Chorus)
Wore a merkin
On film for the very first time
Wore a merkin
Full frontal showin'
No vagine...
Yes, wore the rug, boys
Honeypot to mask
Carpet in plain view
One for each lass!
Hair so fine, squiggly lines
Looks all wrong, as the scenes unfold
Compared to topless shots
Which are always hot
But then down to triangles!
(Chorus)
Oooh, oooh, oooh
It's a crime and a lie
Furry piece of threaded pie
No, it's not real
Has a rough feel
Some are glued, others tied...
(Chorus)
Wore a merkin, not smooth
Wore a merkin
Looks bad on the outside
It's so furry, and so ugly, like in the '70s!
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Drives me crazy
TV does modern nude scenes, where
Rug's not applied...
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