I want to be martial art-y
Do Haiku-do or car-ate
Is there one called Gujarate?
All of them prepared to spar

But which style I should be choosing
I am finding most kung-fusing
Any "way" name is amusing
Well, they all sound quite.. bizarre

In the style of Fighting Beagle
Move around a bit like Smeagol
For with wagging tails they fight
Caninical fraternity

Beagle Tai Chi
Obviously
You sniff out your own "Way"
Smelling behinds
Of all mankind
Together we'll fight someday

Do only nuns use nunchaku?
Can only a jew do judo?
Am I clueless to do clue-do?
True, few do rue Wado-ryu

Wing Chun for the Wing King army
Wang King hands down beats Salami
Tae Kwon Don't or Origami
Can a guy do Kanga-ryu?

Follow Way of Fighting Beagle
Sure now it's the style for me-gle
Black puddings for Ecky thump
Are merely food for beagle-tea


Beagle Tai Chi
The style for me
Just make it your own "way"
Nobody minds
Sniffing behinds
Whoever we'll bite someday

[Howling guitar solo]

Try chi Way of Fighting Beagle
Dressed in white is good for gi-gle
On his heels the postman bite
He's running for eternity

Beagle Tai Chi
In doggie gi
Cock your leg in this way
So many kinds
[Of] smelly behinds
Together in white cliché
Together we'll bite someday
Forever we fight
In leather that's tight
Be so impolite
Some day
How- ow- owl
How- ow- owwwwwwwwwww
Owwwwwwwwwww
Owwwwwl