I FIND TURDS IN STRANGE PLACES

Blame it all on my cat
He’s way too damn fat
He ruins my rug with that scent
Though he is not blind
The box he can’t find
So he creatively hides excrement

When I find that “surprise”
Through the window he flies
And I run for the rags in the drain
Someday he goes
Not funny, on my good clothes
I’ll never be rid of that stain

Cause I find turds in strange places
When it’s on the bed, the broom chases
That cat away.....Almost eve’ry day
I find it in my shoe laces
When I go to work I find traces
Of feline crap in strange places

Went out of my way
Adopting a stray
Came meowing at my back door
Thanks for this, Lord
This is my reward
Now I’m cleaning poop off the floor

Don’t wanna be mean
But this pet’s obscene
I’m gonna build him a pen
Just give me a
Single damn day
He’ll be up with his heavenly father
And you’ll never know

Cause I find turds in strange places
When it’s on the chair, the broom chases
That cat away.....Almost eve’ry day
I find it in my shoe laces
When I go to work I find traces
Of feline crap in strange places