Oooh, poke me in the anus

I go off to the doc
Get checked for hemorrhoids
But everything that he's doing
It makes me annoyed
'Cause he's reaming round in there
With his chubby latex finger
I don't even wanna say
Come and poke me in the anus

Well I know he's trained
In proctology
And I know there's a reason
He does this to me
But it still feels strange
'Specially cause he's a lad
If he were a woman
Wouldn't be so bad
'Least he hasn't hit my colon
Come and poke me in the anus

In the anus in the anus
In the anus in the anus in the anus
In the anus in the anus in the anus
In in in the anus
Come and poke me in the anus

Well when you go hit 50
Then you have to go
In to get a colonoscopy
A polyp-check, you know
They stick this long tube in ya
With a camera on the end
It takes a lot of pictures
That to Mom you wouldn't send

Well I know he's trained
In proctology
And I know there's a reason
He does this to me
But it still feels strange
'Specially cause he's a lad
If he were a woman
Wouldn't be so bad
Now he's deep inside my colon
Come and poke me in the anus

In the anus in the anus
In the anus in the anus in the anus
In the anus in the anus in the anus
In in in the anus
Come and poke me in the anus

In the anus in the anus
In the anus in the anus in the anus
In the anus in the anus in the anus
In in in the anus
Come and poke me in the anus

Doctor doctor, must you poke me
Doctor doctor, must you poke me
Doctor doctor, must you poke me
There, there, there?

Doctor doctor, must you poke me
Doctor doctor, must you poke me
Doctor doctor, holy smokes!
Not there, there, there!

In the anus in the anus
In the anus in the anus in the anus
In the anus in the anus in the anus
In in in the anus
Come and poke me in the anus

In the anus in the anus
In the anus in the anus in the anus
In the anus in the anus in the anus
In in in the anus
Come and poke me in the anus