I thought "Oh damn!"
There was spam
When I started up Windows
I saw the pictures of little blue pills with a "V"
T'was not expensive
And as I replied I thought, "hey, how hard can it be?"

I might buy Viagra
Why not try Viagra?
I could see
That offshore and cheap pharmacy
And so I sent off my four pounds and ninety-nine p

At break of day
It would not go away
My erection
I called in sick
'Cause my dick
Wouldn't point at the floor
It just got harder
And I felt the knife in my hand and t'was hard, no more

Why, why, why, Viagra
Why'd I try Viagra?
Oh, the pain as they try to sew it back again
Now I've tried Viagra but next time, I think I'll refrain..

[another organ solo]

Now I'm not laughing
Whatever I try with my hand.. it's not hard, no more
Why'd I buy Viagra?
Why, why, why, Viagra
Oh, I'm sore and my dick only points at the floor
Now I've tried Viagra I just wouldn't take any more
Now I've tried Viagra I just wouldn't take any more