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Song Parodies -> "Dihydrogen Monoxide"
Original Song Title:
"Nineteenth Nervous Breakdown"
Original Performer:
The Rolling Stones
Parody Song Title:
"Dihydrogen Monoxide"
Parody Written by:
Phil Alexander
The Lyrics
To anybody who isn't already aware of the dangers of Dihydrogen Monoxide ("the invisible killer") and the governmental conspiracy that refuses to ban this dangerous and deadly chemical - have a look at DHMO.org - the truth about DHMO.
Well, it's a chemic-
Al that's endemic,
It's present in the ground
But we're all strangers
To all the dangers
When there's so much around
Well it seems to me
That the powers that be
Have known all this for years
And though they've tried
They just can't hide
It's even in your tears
They cover up - but it's around
Here it comes - don't succumb, don't be numb - don't be dumb:
Beware Dihydrogen Monoxide
When inhalation
Causes inhumation
You often end up dead
And I don't mean to scare ya
But it's everywhere, yeah
Even in your head
The government neglecting DHMO is insane
'Cause it's THE major constituent part of acid rain
They cover up - but it's around
Here it comes - don't succumb, don't be numb - don't be dumb:
Beware Dihydrogen Monoxide
Oh, who's to blame? It's poured down the drain:
Industrial solvent used at work:
Just poured away makes matters worse for me
Pollutes the seas
And lakes and trees,
The reservoirs we drink
It's in the grass
It's a greenhouse gas
We're standing on the brink
This may astound you
But it's all around you
You better understand
And realize
We must organize
And get this substance banned
They cover up - but it's around
Here it comes - don't succumb, don't be numb - don't be dumb:
Beware Dihydrogen Monoxide
Beware Dihydrogen Monoxide
Al that's endemic,
It's present in the ground
But we're all strangers
To all the dangers
When there's so much around
Well it seems to me
That the powers that be
Have known all this for years
And though they've tried
They just can't hide
It's even in your tears
They cover up - but it's around
Here it comes - don't succumb, don't be numb - don't be dumb:
Beware Dihydrogen Monoxide
When inhalation
Causes inhumation
You often end up dead
And I don't mean to scare ya
But it's everywhere, yeah
Even in your head
The government neglecting DHMO is insane
'Cause it's THE major constituent part of acid rain
They cover up - but it's around
Here it comes - don't succumb, don't be numb - don't be dumb:
Beware Dihydrogen Monoxide
Oh, who's to blame? It's poured down the drain:
Industrial solvent used at work:
Just poured away makes matters worse for me
Pollutes the seas
And lakes and trees,
The reservoirs we drink
It's in the grass
It's a greenhouse gas
We're standing on the brink
This may astound you
But it's all around you
You better understand
And realize
We must organize
And get this substance banned
They cover up - but it's around
Here it comes - don't succumb, don't be numb - don't be dumb:
Beware Dihydrogen Monoxide
Beware Dihydrogen Monoxide
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 3 | 4 | 3 | ||||||||
| 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | ||||||||
| 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 1 | 2 | 2 | ||||||||
| 5 | 19 | 19 | 19 |
User Comments
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Good job, Phil Isn't this the stuff that I used to see signs for in every hardware-store window back in the 1980s?
Hardware stores? Not that I'm aware of... but you can buy DHMO in pretty much every supermarket; restaurants serve it, too.
Phil, I'm thinking of DMSO (dimethyl sulfoxide), a toxic "liniment" that was everywhere a few years ago.
nice wordplay, Phil, your trademark, and a difficult OS I would have thought - 555
Let's see... Dihydrogen... H2... Monoxide... O... that would make the chemical symbol for Dihydrogen Monoxide H2O... but that's water under the bridge now.
Psst... Michael - don't tell everyone: the fun of a song like this is realizing that not everyone knows WTF you're on about ;-)
Stuart - I went though a lot of songs to find one that scanned for "Dihydrogen Monoxide" (including "YMCA" (DHMO) and "The dangers of DHMO" (A Few of my Favourite Things) - which would work pretty well, but I've already done that song too many times) which also included enough internal rhyming to make it fun - but once I'd got this OS, it nearly wrote itself from lines taken from the DHMO.org FAQ page.
Stuart - I went though a lot of songs to find one that scanned for "Dihydrogen Monoxide" (including "YMCA" (DHMO) and "The dangers of DHMO" (A Few of my Favourite Things) - which would work pretty well, but I've already done that song too many times) which also included enough internal rhyming to make it fun - but once I'd got this OS, it nearly wrote itself from lines taken from the DHMO.org FAQ page.
555. But doesn't DHMO stand for something else? Heh heh heh... ;-)
er... what else, JD?
You took a challenging topic and made your point very cleverly. Well done, Phil.
(sotm) Very nice, the environment needs the attention.
Seeing as the SOTM voting thread is now up, I thought I'd better point this out so as everyone's voting on a level playing field, so to speak: this is a spoof... although pretty much every word in the song is accurate, DHMO is not a danger to the environment (though some people in southern Asia might disagree with that statement at the moment)... as Guy pointed out in a slightly more subtle way: DHMO is water, plain and simple. Which is why I love the dhmo.org website - it's taking the piss out of all those environmental and food scare stories we so love to read in the papers.
(SOTM) Quick, we gotta get Ralph Nader on this right away! :)
(SOTM) *inhales fresh outback air* Fine work, Phil.
(SOTM) I'm not sure but I think that Johnny might refer to DHMO as in "a dickhead in my opinon" or something like that. But like I said, I'm not sure.
Two true anecdotes:
(1) Penn & Teller have a cable show called "Bullshit"; in one segment they went to an environmental rally and got a bunch of people to sign a petition to ban Dihydrogen Monoxide.
(2) A pipe broke in my basement recently, and it turned out that my pipes were literally filled with Dihydrogen Monoxide. The stuff got everywhere; I had to replace a bunch of carpet and furniture.
Anyhoo, fun stuff, Philbo. I like the acid rain line best. And great choice of original.
(1) Penn & Teller have a cable show called "Bullshit"; in one segment they went to an environmental rally and got a bunch of people to sign a petition to ban Dihydrogen Monoxide.
(2) A pipe broke in my basement recently, and it turned out that my pipes were literally filled with Dihydrogen Monoxide. The stuff got everywhere; I had to replace a bunch of carpet and furniture.
Anyhoo, fun stuff, Philbo. I like the acid rain line best. And great choice of original.
Clever stuff as always, Phil -- and thanks to both you and Michael for letting me in on the joke so I wouldn't look like a total douchebag agreeing with you in self-righteous outrage (I do that sometimes, really I do). Great stuff.
(SOTM) Phil, once more you have blinded me with science...where's that eye-wash? Oops, I poured some of that damned DMHO stuff in them instead...good thing I submitted those "5" scores first...
I should have read this parody before I got a stomachache. I mixed some dihydrogen monoxide with milk and drank it and I have the worst tummy ache in a long time. I read about this stuff in the 11th grade, and thank you for reminding me of it! 5's to you, Phil.
Ah Phil, ya big spoofster! (I made sure I didn't mis-spell that last word, hey?) You had me going! Funny. I had a whole lot of DHMO fall on my house today, if only I had known I should have been concerned!
(SOTM) See above.
SOTM--very clever, Phil!
(SOTM) already commented - very clever Phil
I have to admit that I read and commented on this parody earlier without perceiving the hoax, so my hat is off to you, Phil. Great job!
DKTOS, but I'll trust the word of the others so as not to pollute your score. Great rhyme scheme regardless, Phil. Give 'em the old 2-1 punch, hydrogen and oxide.
(SOTM) Educational.
:-D Thanks, everybody
Spaff - maybe I should have included a bit on the deleterious effect of DHMO on furnishings...
Spaff - maybe I should have included a bit on the deleterious effect of DHMO on furnishings...
this got me goin till I read the comments...ingenious!
Very well done!
(SOTM) Excellent Phil!
(SOTM) Excellent, Phil!!
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