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Song Parodies -> "Are You Kidding, Franklin Pierce?"
Original Song Title:
"Reeling In the Years"
(MP3)Original Performer:
Steely Dan
Parody Song Title:
"Are You Kidding, Franklin Pierce?"
Parody Written by:
Michael Pacholek
The Lyrics
It's been a while since I posted anything, let alone another chapter in my All-42-Presidents project. This almost became a "M*A*S*H" parody: "Are You Kidding, Hawkeye Pierce?" But this guy may have been the worst of the 42... of course, that record may not hold for long.
Your everlasting policies, you can see them falling fast.
So you let the slave States rule you, thinking they are gonna last.
Well, you wouldn't know your freedom if you held it in your hand.
The way you cozy to the Southerners, I just don't understand.
Are you kidding, Franklin Pierce? Throwin' away your chance
to drive away the nation's tears, abolitionist's advance?
Are you kidding, Franklin Pierce? Throwin' away your chance
to drive away the nation's tears, abolitionist's advance?
You've been telling us that we don't need no Amendment Number 13.
Take a look at the plantation owners, can't you see that they're so mean?
The Kansas-Nebraska Act didn't turn out like you planned.
And if you run for re-election, you are going to get canned.
Are you kidding, Franklin Pierce? Throwin' away your chance
to drive away the nation's tears, abolitionist's advance?
Are you kidding, Franklin Pierce? Throwin' away your chance
to drive away the nation's tears, abolitionist's advance?
(instrumental break)
Well, it cost a lot of money and it cost a lot of lives
but we won the Civil War in April 1865.
If you'd only done the right thing in '54 like we all planned
perhaps we would not have that drunk fool Andrew Johnson in command.
Are you kidding, Franklin Pierce? Throwin' away your chance
to drive away the nation's tears, abolitionist's advance?
Are you kidding, Franklin Pierce? Throwin' away your chance
to drive away the nation's tears, abolitionist's advance?
So you let the slave States rule you, thinking they are gonna last.
Well, you wouldn't know your freedom if you held it in your hand.
The way you cozy to the Southerners, I just don't understand.
Are you kidding, Franklin Pierce? Throwin' away your chance
to drive away the nation's tears, abolitionist's advance?
Are you kidding, Franklin Pierce? Throwin' away your chance
to drive away the nation's tears, abolitionist's advance?
You've been telling us that we don't need no Amendment Number 13.
Take a look at the plantation owners, can't you see that they're so mean?
The Kansas-Nebraska Act didn't turn out like you planned.
And if you run for re-election, you are going to get canned.
Are you kidding, Franklin Pierce? Throwin' away your chance
to drive away the nation's tears, abolitionist's advance?
Are you kidding, Franklin Pierce? Throwin' away your chance
to drive away the nation's tears, abolitionist's advance?
(instrumental break)
Well, it cost a lot of money and it cost a lot of lives
but we won the Civil War in April 1865.
If you'd only done the right thing in '54 like we all planned
perhaps we would not have that drunk fool Andrew Johnson in command.
Are you kidding, Franklin Pierce? Throwin' away your chance
to drive away the nation's tears, abolitionist's advance?
Are you kidding, Franklin Pierce? Throwin' away your chance
to drive away the nation's tears, abolitionist's advance?
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 5 | 5 | 5 |
User Comments
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I like history parodies, and this is a good one, Professor Pacholek.
Not one of America's most memorable presidents but your parody is. Well done history lesson there Michael. Oh yeah, the parody wasn't bad either.
love the idea of these ... 5s
frankly brilliant...5s.
Finally Franklin Peirce gets his due! All 5s, even though G.W. Bush is worse than Pierce...
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