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Song Parodies -> "Spilling My Coffee"
Original Song Title:
"Killing Me Softly"
(MP3)Original Performer:
Roberta Flack
Parody Song Title:
"Spilling My Coffee"
Parody Written by:
Rick Cormier
The Lyrics
Frivolous lawsuits are a plague to the court system here in the US. Everybody's a victim of something....
I heard they made good coffee
I heard they were in style
And so I hit the drive through
And in a little while
They handed me a foam cup
And then I drove away-ay
Steering my car with one finger
Dialing my phone with my nose
Spilling my coffee on my hands
Spilling hot coffee, burned my hands
Suing their asses with lawyers
'Cause they spilled my coffeeon my hands
There were no signs that I saw
Warning I could get burned
This is, for them, a costly
Lesson to be learned
I had no way of knowing
So I just kept right oh-on
Rolling up windows with elbows
Driving with both my eyes closed
Spilling my coffee on my hands
Spilling hot coffee, burned my hands
Suing their asses with lawyers
'Cause they spilled my coffeeon my hands
Five million bucks should do me
The lawyers got their share
A new idea came to me
I think I'll dry my hair
A new way in the morning
In the microwa-ave
Set cruise control with my kneecap
Reading a book as I drive
Spilling my coffee on my hands
Spilling hot coffee, burned my hands
Suing their asses with lawyers
They made me spill coffeeon my hands
Yeah, it was way too damned hot
Yeah, it was hot enough to burn
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, owwhoa-oh-oh, whoa-oh-oh
Whoa-oh-oh, whoa-oh-oh
Spilling my coffee..on my hands
I heard they were in style
And so I hit the drive through
And in a little while
They handed me a foam cup
And then I drove away-ay
Steering my car with one finger
Dialing my phone with my nose
Spilling my coffee on my hands
Spilling hot coffee, burned my hands
Suing their asses with lawyers
'Cause they spilled my coffeeon my hands
There were no signs that I saw
Warning I could get burned
This is, for them, a costly
Lesson to be learned
I had no way of knowing
So I just kept right oh-on
Rolling up windows with elbows
Driving with both my eyes closed
Spilling my coffee on my hands
Spilling hot coffee, burned my hands
Suing their asses with lawyers
'Cause they spilled my coffeeon my hands
Five million bucks should do me
The lawyers got their share
A new idea came to me
I think I'll dry my hair
A new way in the morning
In the microwa-ave
Set cruise control with my kneecap
Reading a book as I drive
Spilling my coffee on my hands
Spilling hot coffee, burned my hands
Suing their asses with lawyers
They made me spill coffeeon my hands
Yeah, it was way too damned hot
Yeah, it was hot enough to burn
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, owwhoa-oh-oh, whoa-oh-oh
Whoa-oh-oh, whoa-oh-oh
Spilling my coffee..on my hands
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | ||||||||
| 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 2 | 1 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 32 | 34 | 35 |
User Comments
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Forget parody of the month, this is my parody of the day! Fantastic stuff, Rick, you truly are a master of words 555
I especially love the lines that describe the stupid things the driver is doing... "Steering my car with one finger ... Dialing my phone with my nose" ... "Rolling up windows with elbows ... Driving with both my eyes closed" ... "Set cruise control with my kneecap ... Reading a book as I drive"
Spilling some 5's on you
True and funny. Great job, Rick. 5's
A work of art, Rick...especially the choruses. 555
my favorite of the day..i laughed so hard i spilled MY coffee
Hilarious from start to finish. A true masterpiece, and definitely SOTM worthy. Great lines EVERYWHERE.
Excellent, I can certainly relate. Sign Arwen up for the video, she's a natural for this one!
Rick this is FABulous...I have way too many favorite lines to pick one to showcase...but I agree that the choruses were the very best!! (and if you want me to star in the video, as Jeff said, I'd be happy to...but it's gonna cost you...; )..)
DKTOS (other than the tagline), but DGAF, either. Great premise, beautifully executed.
Wow, thanks for all your kind words. Arwen, WHAT is it gonna cost me to have you in the video? Do Elf Princess, Divas of Divinity even drive?
These anatomical descriptions are hiliarious!
Finely engineered spoof spotlighting the nonsense of these litigations.
Well, one sure way to get me to do some pro bono work is to call me a Diva of Divinity...=)
I cough-feed up a 555 for you.
Dude, that was so awesome. It's said that suing is what Americans do best, and you pretty much summed it up right there! 5s all the way, my man!
Thank you, Red Ant and Inferno714.
Phil, I think the coffee you spilled was D-GAF-einated.
yeah, beautiful Rick - reminds me of when Kramer did it on Seinfeld - should sue the car-makers next for not installing airbags to protect you from such mishaps - 555
Thanks, Stu. I don't remember that episode but, I'm a big Kramer fan!
I'm told that the heat of the coffee is to cover up the lack of strengt of taste, I'm surprised that it can hurt anything. (We're talking about Starbucks here, aren't we?).
Peter, I'm not sure it was Starbuck's. I remember hearing about a settlement a couple of years ago against one of the fast-food chains. I think it may have been McDonalds, actually. Anyway, this person burned themselves while driving and drinking coffee. The lawyers claimed there weren't warnings about the potential of hot coffee to burn. The jury found for the plaintiff and awarded millions. Lack of common sense doesn't even come into question in many of these lawsuits.
This parody had me laughing so hard, I think I gave all fives but I was laughing so hard I'm not sure where I clicked. Awesome job.
555s - great - everyone else has said it all ;-) Thanks also for the comments at mine
Thank you and, you're welcome Cryptic Wizard and LucidLupin LeeBee
5's Wonderfully written. This would be a great recording!
Unfortunetly the lady who sued McDonalds won...pretty sad, huh? Awesome job.
(ABC-S05) Wow, what a lame pun I used before! Great work with SGLTM (Several Great Lines to Mention). This sounds like many *cough* tourist *cough* drivers in VA.
(ABC) I echo Red's use of the acronym SGTLM. 555
(S) see above - yes, unaccountability is a HUGE trend, Rick, and great parody fodder - excellent
DKTOS, but funny read.
(ABC) See above!
ABC- Really funny
(ABC) Frivilous lawsuits are one of those satire worthy aspects of society. Well done.
(ABC) OK, I give up... where did you get the tape of my driving test??? Excellent song :-)
ABC--I think I liked this even more this time around...it's just SO freaking hilarious!! Great Great GREAT!!!
ABC: Story of my morning life :)
it was wicked- i played the original and sang along with this version, i know it sounds as if i'm a saddo but u should try it if u havent yet!
This is brilliant. I couldn't stop laughing.
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