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Song Parodies -> "Short Crim'nals"
Original Song Title:
"Short People"
Original Performer:
Randy Newman
Parody Song Title:
"Short Crim'nals"
Parody Written by:
Royce Miller
The Lyrics
About a case in Nebraska in which the judge sentenced a child molester to probation instead of jail cause "he's too short"...original song is from Randy Newman's "Little Criminals" album.
Short crim'nals get probation
Short crim'nals get probation
Short crim'nals get probation
No jail
They got stubby legs
Can't climb bunks
They walk around
In a little funk
They need garden hoses
To get a drink
They wear platform shoes
But they still can't reach the sink
Well Judge don't want those short crim'nals
Judge don't want short crim'nals
Judge don't want short crim'nals
In jail
Short crim'nals should be the same as you and I
As you and I
(Giants like us)
They did the bad crime
And now make em do time
(It's a screwed up world)
Short crim'nals got short bodies
Short crim'nals got short bodies
Short crim'nals got short bodies
At birth
So they can use their baby legs
To do baby crimes
The judge will cut em slack
Won't give em no time
They need little cells
And 5 foot roommates
To see eye to eye
When they have a date
If you got grubby little fingers
And a grubby little mind
You're gonna get off every time
Well, judge don't want no short crim'nals
Judge don't want short crim'nals
Judge don't want short crim'nals
In jail
Short crim'nals get probation
Short crim'nals get probation
No jail
They got stubby legs
Can't climb bunks
They walk around
In a little funk
They need garden hoses
To get a drink
They wear platform shoes
But they still can't reach the sink
Well Judge don't want those short crim'nals
Judge don't want short crim'nals
Judge don't want short crim'nals
In jail
Short crim'nals should be the same as you and I
As you and I
(Giants like us)
They did the bad crime
And now make em do time
(It's a screwed up world)
Short crim'nals got short bodies
Short crim'nals got short bodies
Short crim'nals got short bodies
At birth
So they can use their baby legs
To do baby crimes
The judge will cut em slack
Won't give em no time
They need little cells
And 5 foot roommates
To see eye to eye
When they have a date
If you got grubby little fingers
And a grubby little mind
You're gonna get off every time
Well, judge don't want no short crim'nals
Judge don't want short crim'nals
Judge don't want short crim'nals
In jail
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| 5 | 8 | 8 | 8 |
User Comments
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The long and the short of it is this: good parody, Royce.
'Twas brillig, 5S
You go girl!
This contribution does not come up short..excellent take on that newzy...5's
Incisive commentary. 5s
Thangs that make you go pffft!
Excellent job of taking of taking on the current trend of considering perpetrators of crime to be victims.
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