The tree is brittle, dry and dead she said to me,
So please take it down and put it out its misery.
To pay these bills we'll have to juggle our money,
There must be fifty ways to pay for Christmas.

Creditors calling it's their habit to be rude,
The Christmas feasts were wonderful and enhanced the Christmas mood,
But now for the next three months the cuisine is canned food.
There must be fifty ways to pay for Christmas.
Fifty ways to pay for Christmas.

Get back in the black, Jack,
Don't sit on your can, Stan,
Get another employ, Roy,
Just go get some money.
Won't help to cuss, Gus,
Some cash a big plus, Dutch,
Go on pay the fee, Lee,
Some home equity.

Ohhh, get back in the black, Jack,
Don't sit on your can, Stan,
Get another employ, Roy,
Just go get some money.
Won't help to cuss, Gus,
Some cash a big plus, Dutch,
Go on pay the fee, Lee,
Some home equity.

Said she believes that the spending gets insane,
Party hardy New Years eve with all that overpriced champagne,
So then I said, "I'd drink to that", she thought my joke was lame.
"Knock off the dumb cliches".

She said "the creditors are calling day and night".
She's tried to talk to them but they are not being real polite,
We're so remiss our checks like rubber bounce higher than a kite,
We need nifty ways to pay for Christmas.
Fifty ways to pay for Christmas.

Get back in the black, Jack,
Don't sit on your can, Stan,
Get another employ, Roy,
Just go get some money.
Won't help to cuss, Gus,
Some cash a big plus, Dutch,
Go on pay the fee, Lee,
Some home equity.

Get back in the black, Jack,
Don't sit on your can, Stan,
Get another employ, Roy,
Just go get some money.
Won't help to cuss, Gus,
Some cash a big plus, Dutch,
Go on pay the fee, Lee,
Some home equity.