when she walks, when she walks
well, of course, she has a limp
(when she walks, of course, she has a limp)
oh my gosh, how she rocks
cause, of course, she is a gimp
(how, of course, she rocks, cause she's a gimp)
now's she's fallen down
and she is strugglin' down there still

my wife walks weird...(my wife walks weird)
her leg flies out...(her leg flies out)
my wife, she got one leg
but off she run

yes, its off...yes, its off...on a mock one, she depends
(yes, its off, so on a mock she depends)
leg, she'll doff...and hold 'loft...got a knee that really bends
(leg, she doffs, shows off...the knee really bends)
but she let me down...now, my cash, she wants to spend

a peg goes in...(a peg goes in)
a strap grows taut...(a strap grows taut)
most wives, they got two legs...but mine got one

well......she's still spry...she's still spry...she's still spry
yes, she's spry enough to bound
(still she's spry enough to bounce around)
she will fly...she will fly...she will fly
she will try if leg allows
(she'll be flyin' if her peg leg allows)

but if she's knocked down...that's a killer...that's no good
but you know i'd laugh aloud

my wife waltz weird...(my wife waltz weird)
the grace ain't there...(the grace ain't there)
most wives. they got two legs
my wife, she got one
most wives, they got two legs
my wife, she got one
most wives, they got two legs
my wife, she got...one