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Song Parodies -> "He Won't Be One of those Jail Ho's Wardened"
Original Song Title:
"I Never Promised You A Rose Garden"
Original Performer:
Lynn Anderson
Parody Song Title:
"He Won't Be One of those Jail Ho's Wardened"
Parody Written by:
Violet T. Riol
The Lyrics
He hasn't been pardoned...yet
Scooter was pardoned
He won't be one of those jail ho's hardoned
He'll now see the sunshine
Like the other crooks, he won't do no time
He was made to take the fall, and that's what he did
Now let go
Scooter was pardoned,
He won't be one of those jail ho's hardoned
He was promised by Dick that if he did stick
To the script, do his shtik that he would roll over
And not be the warden's gofer
Scoot's lack of talkin' moved judge to say "I'm behooved
Because you are such a churl, to throw you in the slammer"
He packed his pajamas
But smiled all the while because the folly
Was structured so he would be jolly
The plan was to not let him be in the can
Scooter was pardoned
He won't be one of those jail ho's wardened
He'll now see the sunshine
Like the other crooks, he won't do no time
He didn't sing a tune; was no pigeon who crooned
He laughed while the judge said "I'll scold you"
Now the system's let him go
And though he wasn't a prison ho'
He was sure a ho' for the creep who's known as the veep
Whose marionette gave the order to let Scoot out
And you know who I'm talking about
He smiled all the while, because the folly
Was structured so he would be jolly
The plan was to not let him be in the can
Scooter was pardoned
He won't be one of those jail ho's hardoned
Dubya said "a small crime"
And then nullified Scooter's doing time
He won't be one of those jail ho's hardoned
He'll now see the sunshine
Like the other crooks, he won't do no time
He was made to take the fall, and that's what he did
Now let go
Scooter was pardoned,
He won't be one of those jail ho's hardoned
He was promised by Dick that if he did stick
To the script, do his shtik that he would roll over
And not be the warden's gofer
Scoot's lack of talkin' moved judge to say "I'm behooved
Because you are such a churl, to throw you in the slammer"
He packed his pajamas
But smiled all the while because the folly
Was structured so he would be jolly
The plan was to not let him be in the can
Scooter was pardoned
He won't be one of those jail ho's wardened
He'll now see the sunshine
Like the other crooks, he won't do no time
He didn't sing a tune; was no pigeon who crooned
He laughed while the judge said "I'll scold you"
Now the system's let him go
And though he wasn't a prison ho'
He was sure a ho' for the creep who's known as the veep
Whose marionette gave the order to let Scoot out
And you know who I'm talking about
He smiled all the while, because the folly
Was structured so he would be jolly
The plan was to not let him be in the can
Scooter was pardoned
He won't be one of those jail ho's hardoned
Dubya said "a small crime"
And then nullified Scooter's doing time
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Voting Breakdown
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| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 15 | 15 | 15 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 3 | 3 | 3 |
User Comments
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Right. This wasn't a pardon. And Barry Bonds never used steroids. Keep 'em comin', Violet, until it's all over. Eighteen months. Five hundred and sixty-six days. Unless he and Cheney follow the suggestion of our boy Keith Olbermann: Resign.
Good job, here
It sucks. And that loser Olbermann should take the hint from the free-falling ratings on his show and resign: nobody listens to the foamy ravings of that fool except for shrieking crybabies like you.
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