Well, life on the farm is startin’ to suck
Ain’t no heifers for me to fuck
Might as well go jerk off in the truck
Piss off, I’m a country boy

I get out of bed every morning at four
Take a healthy piss, then I go and do the chores
There’d better be coffee when I come back through the door
Piss off, I’m a country boy

I drink at a tavern with a bunch of old coots
Stand at the bar, scrape the shit off my boots
We all tell lies and fill our snoots
Piss off, I’m a country boy

Well, I’d spend all day in my marijuana patch
Or down at the strip club chasin’ some snatch
But Lord only knows what shit I’d catch
Piss off, I’m a country boy

Well my wife ran off, don’t miss her a bit
She left me the kids but they don’t do shit
Pass me the jug, I need another hit
Piss off, I’m a country boy

Well I’d love to trade my farm for New York digs
Or a solid gold Zippo to light my cigs
But I’m still here castrating pigs
Piss off, I’m a country boy

New houses nearby and they closed my well
I get letters from their lawyers complaining of the smell
So I told the motherfuckers to go straight to Hell
Piss off, I’m a country boy

Well my wife ran off, don’t miss her a bit
She left me the kids but they don’t do shit
Pass me the jug, I need another hit
Piss off, I’m a country boy

I’m in debt to my ears, things are falling apart
And I’m working part-time at the local Walmart
Where the kids ask their moms why I smell like a fart
Piss off, I’m a country boy

Well my Dad worked this farm and my Granddad too
There was never any question of what I was gonna do
That’s why I’m here singin’ these shitkicker blues…

Piss off, I’m a country boy, motherfuckers!