I went out to a party last month
Just to smile and enjoy a few beers
All of the talkin' and all of the squawkin'
Wonderin' what the hell I did hear

I didn't ponder the babble too long
I was confused and went out for a bite
Ran into a guy with a kilo of Thai
And we wound up bongin' all night

It's that
Strange and new chatter, dude
Strange and new platitudes
Stuffin' new slang in my brain

Although we're all humming
New words that sound cunning
Linguistical madness will drive us insane

Reading graffiti signs sprayed in the subway
Reminds me of places to avoid
Hearin' teenagers shout "Miss me wit all dat"
Sounds like they've got verbal hem'rhoids

Maybe I'm just "throwin' salt in my game"
But I just can't adjust to this talk
"Poo nanny niches" and "chicken-head bitches"
Vulgarities at which I balk

This
Strange and new chatter, dude
Strange and new platitudes
Language that seems quite deranged

When they say they're "chillin' "
Just like some "phat villain"
They're full of "green trees", "philly", and "mary jane"

They're spendin' their "bones", "lucci", "scratch", and their "cheddar"
"Ducketts", "skrilla", "grip", and their "means"
(There's) So many words them kids have for their money
God I wish I was once more sixteen

But yesterday is over my shoulder
So I can't look back for too long
All the slang them kids say mystifies me to-day
I guess I'm just an old fart who bongs

Oh that
Strange and new chatter, dude
Strange and new platitudes
English has gone down the drain

With all of my humming
And all of my cunning
Linguistics and laughter collide in my brain
Them kids all just laugh 'cause my words sound so lame
If those kids ain't crazy, they must be insane!