(Chorus)
He's bold, he's bad, he's "Downtown Vlad"
The baddest dictator Russia's ever had.
Badder than a "Tsunami Quake"
Meaner than a "Rattlesnake".S

In the Southside of "Old Moscow"
In the wealthiest part of town.
If you venture down there You best be aware
Of the man they call "Downtown Vlad".
"Downtown" looks for trouble.
He stands about 5 feet "0"
To the Moscow Ladies he's the "Short Arm Lover"
To his "Troops" he' "El Czaro".

(Repeat Chorus)

He's got "Intercontinental Nukes"
That evade radar detection too.
A million man "Militia", he uses just to "Get Ya' ".
He carries "Seran Gas" in his shoe.
There's a "Team of Hot-Shot Oligarchs"
"Planting Wet Ones" on his "Caboose".
Check out a "Shirtless Vlad" in his "Disco Pad"
"Flex his Pecs" when he decides to "Cut Loose".

(Repeat Chorus)

In the middle of February in the year of '22,
"Downtown Vlad" assembled his army
And began the "Ukraine Invasion" too.
He thought the war would soon be over
And his victory would ensue.
Little did he "Know"
"You Reap What You Sow".
He "Bit Off More Than He Could Chew"

(Repeat Chorus)