(oldster):
I’ve learned that you think seventy
Means life is meant for only teens
And while your world is still nubile
The next three verses you've compiled
(young'un):
If dentureless, you never chew'th
Need nappies tight for when you poo'th
And bent on fun swill Geritol
And fantasize of Dr. Ru'th...

Arthritis got your bones in stasis
Cracks appear on sagging faces
Pension means detained at home
Depend on others, all alone
Install toupee on tressless bean
And nurture wood viagrally
It’s tonics, pills and creams at seventy

Too-much told tale again recounts
Woe - things now sag that used to bounce
When driving, passengers unnerve
Now geriatric, void of verve
(oldster):
Above narratin’ small town teen
Scary finds such fact aggrieved
With a horror so discomforting:
In decades you’ll be elderly...

Remember those you think insane
Use more of just half their brain
There’s no-one who would disagree:
You speak mono-syllablic'ly
Insurance rates are rapin' you;
Not near so high: my payments due
My bank account's well-heeled at seventy

Unhealthfulness in all your miens
For exercise, choose GameBoy scenes
(My glow enflames as I recall
When jumping in leaves stacked at fall)
Not so opportune in career-way:
The world of youngsters of today
'Less reams of college (costly fees)
You’re stuck with work at Micky Ds

You all play at gangs, graffiti share
They’re falling down - those pants you wear
Just text your lovers on the phone
No in-ti-ma-cy can be sown
That "hooking up's" romance for thee
And burn your brains with Ecstasy
I smug, prefer to be, age seventy...