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Song Parodies -> "The Wreck Of The Black Friday Shopping Spree"

Original Song Title:

"The Wreck Of The Edmund Fitzgerald"

Original Performer:

Gordon Lightfoot

Parody Song Title:

"The Wreck Of The Black Friday Shopping Spree"

Parody Written by:

The Parody Author

The Lyrics

Black Friday is coming soon! Get that credit card out!
The legend lives on from the shoppers who throng,
To the malls and the stores they call ‘bargain heaven’.
The deals, they are said, never last very long
When the frenzy of Black Friday comes a-raging
With a load of cash and credit cards galore,
They would spend and splurge more than they could afford.
That mad crowd and true was a sight to behold
When the doors of the stores opened early

The spree was the pride of the consumerist side,
Coming back from a year of saving and waiting
As the big spenders go, they were bolder than most
With a zeal and a passion unmatched by any
Concluding some terms with a couple of sales clerks,
When they left fully loaded with goodies and perks
And later that night when their bills came in sight
Could it be the remorse they’d been feeling?

The carts in the aisles made a clattering sound,
And a pile of goods toppled over the railing,
And every one knew, as the manager did too
'Twas the curse of the Black Friday come stealing
The lunchtime came late and the hunger had to wait
When the queues of the checkout came snaking
When afternoon came it was chaos and pain
In the face of a stampede unending

When closing time came, the security came on deck saying
Folks, it’s time to leave now
At nine pm a fire alarm went off, he said
Folks, it’s been hell to know ya
The shoppers wired in they had trouble getting out
And the goods and the carts were in peril
And later that night when the firemen arrived
Came the wreck of the Black Friday shopping sprees

Does anyone know where the sense of joy goes
When the greed turns the minutes to hours?
The witnesses all say they’d have made it okay I
f they’d put fifteen more feet between them
They might have got hurt or they might have got crushed
They may have lost more than they gained
And all that remains is the faces and the names
Of the buyers and the sellers and the workers

The mall owners roll, the retailers sing In the rooms of their profit mansion
The shoppers dream like a young child’s dreams
The gifts and the toys are for Christmas
And farther below the bank accounts go
Takes in what the credit cards can lend them
And the debt grows high as the shoppers all know With the bills of the Black Friday remembered

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Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 27

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