I’m distracted from the road and the path I walk
By a gadget that I love where I text and talk.

Dumbphone, a cesspool of germs
Come to find it’s infested with invisible worms.
Dumbphone, addicted all day
Bout as clean as a toilet and an old ashtray.

Well the average dumbphone bill is 200 bucks
And with a family of 5 well that bill really sucks.

Sometimes I go to a game
But I’m so busy texting never saw it, how lame.
Sometimes I go to the mall
Once I fell in the fountain, once my head hit the wall.

Then you have the Twidiots with their mindless words
But I’ll follow just the same like a dog to their turds.

Dumbphone, my battery’s dead
Better go buy a new one or there’s trouble ahead.
Dumbphone, 5 inches of screen
Bout as smart as a drama starring Mr. Bean.

You can see me looking down and my dinner’s cold
Better wolf down my chicken lest it turns to mold.

Smartphone, an oxymoron
I’m enslaved to this gadget, selfie’s all gone wrong.
Dumbphone, a cesspool of germs
Come to find it’s infested with invisible worms.
Dumbphone, addicted all day
Bout as clean as a toilet and an old ashtray.
Smartphone, an oxymoron
I’m enslaved to this gadget, GPS is all wrong.