Nel's a dwarf, guzzling rum with her Sea Man
Stan's the shy type, a sailor who's huge
High from drinking, Captain Morgan
Two sizes love free
Giant and stooge

You know size they say, 'is a pleaser'
(Nothin like dwarves to pound)
When there's no bars to strange
Pygmies to spin around
What may be, might be naughty
Freedom flirts about,
with dirty mouths,
and skirts about deranged

Don't monkey - going sideways
Go seek half pints
Make it with a midget
One your size

Two can't spend all their lives waiting lonely
Two can't spend all their months dating blind
If the small fills the needs of the tall one
The two will be fine

And if you're doin Liliputin
(Nobody sees you there)
When you're behind closed doors
(Love lives fit any pair)
If the munchkin who you're seein
Fills your gunny sack
With funny facts
True love will track its course...

Love meets in a tight space
Go seek half pints
Make it with a midget
One your size
Make it with a midget
Make it with a midger
Make it with a midget
One your size
(Make it with a midget)
W-e-e...
(Make it with a midget)
Come on
(Make it with a midget)
One your size
(Make it with a midget)
W-e-e...
(Make it with a midget)
You gotta
(Make it with a midget)
One your size
(Make it with a midget)
(Make it with a midget)
(Make it with a midget)
One your size
(Make it with a midget)
W-e-e...
(Make it with a midget)
Come on
(Make it with a midget)
One your size
(Make it with a midget)
Aaah-aaah-aaah
(Make it with a midget)
Aaah-aaah
(Make it with a midget)
One your size
(Make it with a midget)
(Make it with a midget)