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Song Parodies -> "Devil 8-Ball"

Original Song Title:

"Devil Woman"

Original Performer:

Cliff Richard

Parody Song Title:

"Devil 8-Ball"

Parody Written by:

Below Average Dave

The Lyrics

I'm at badave.com
My 8-Ball tells me I suck
It tells me I will never be worth more
but it's needs to be sweet baby
because if not I will go toss this ball

This psycho ball isn't able
To answer the questions that you ask
It's possessed with dirty lies
and it tells me to douse in gas

This is a devil eight ball
It's advice ain't divine
Don't read the devil eight ball
It's gonna lead you
Damn this possessed eight ball
Its always so unkind
Beware the devil eight ball
It's gonna make you hate your mind

If you speak to it you're in danger
It knows what your mind is thinkin
It is filled with hate and anger
It forced my dad to go mad

I doubt the words it offered me
It said to not lock my door
To invite those who I despise
and tell them all to bring big sharp swords

This is a devil eight ball
With power hard to find
Can't kill the evil eight ball
It comes back to ya
It is a mental eight ball
With torture on its mind
Yeah this here evil eight ball
is not of the innocent kind

evil mind

I'm afraid
look out

This eight ball well it always lies
Your thoughts to which it always plays
It tricks you with a playful glare
Tryin' to trick you into meticulous games

It's sitting still on the table
It knows your deepest dark past
Sharp black with an evil shine
You'd best go, no questions asked

It is a devil eight ball
Its answers blow my mind
Beware the trickster eight ball
It's out to trick you
Watch for the evil eight ball
Its thoughts are never kind
Oh yes, this cunning eight ball
It has tricked me too
Its not just any eight ball
It can see in your mind
Don't trust its fortunes at all
It wants to hurt you
Destroy the possessed eight ball
Before it kills man-kind
Too late-the evil eight ball
It has consumed you
This has been a Below Average Dave Production, All Rights Reserved. .

What inspired this parody? Here are some real 8-ball responses asked in good fun to my eight ball earlier (some by me, most by friends). . .

If I run around in a monkey costume at the Halloween party, will I get invited to the more personal party the following week? 8-Ball says "Without a Doubt"

Does Jeff Reuben really love Britney Spears? 8 Ball Says "As I See It Yes"

Does McDonald's use real beef in their burgers? 8 Ball says "Don't Count on It"

Do aliens taste good? 8 Ball says "You May Rely On It"

Does listening to Richard Cheese all night make me weird? 8 Ball says "My Sources say no"

Is Freddy Krouger good dating material? 8 Ball "As I See It Yes"

Should I hire Matthias to be chauffer? 8 Ball says "My sources say No"

Is Lady GaGa a clone of Madonna passed down from a love affair between Britney Spears and a male-clone of Christina Aguilera? The 8 ball literally broke when this question was asked. . .

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
 0
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 4   0
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 5   9
 9
 8
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

AFW - October 10, 2011 - Report this comment
Like the idea of a Magic Eight Ball taking over the world...funny premise and parody
Matthias - October 10, 2011 - Report this comment
Good Halloween Parody and I liked all of your fortunes at the end especially the one about my driving. lol
Below Average Dave - October 10, 2011 - Report this comment
Thank you AFW and Matty, yeah I know right? Even the possessed 8-ball told me not to hire you as my driver:)
Christie Marie M - October 10, 2011 - Report this comment
Oh, Dave, I'm sorry I've been missing all your awesome and cool parodies! But I'm glad I was able to find this one. It's just that I'm not on AIR as much as I used to. A very "fortune-ate" parody you wrote! Yeah, those 8-Ball fortune balls are fake if u ask questions on them. Will Christie give Dave 3 sets of 5's?... Here's what the 8-ball says: "You Can Count On It"!
Porfle Popnecker - October 11, 2011 - Report this comment
Good one, brings back memories of when I used to have one of those things.
Katie - October 16, 2011 - Report this comment
Very funny, creative, imaginative
Agrimorfee - October 20, 2011 - Report this comment
This was a funny idea...but why didnt you use the witty commentary about the 8 Ball at the bottom of your parody inside the parody itself? Blown opportunity there.
Rex - October 23, 2011 - Report this comment
(Artistry) I initially thought this was going to be a parody about billiards, it took me a minute to reorient. Now I need to go ask my Ouija board what it thinks of this parody. :-) Reading this gave me a mental picture of a world where everybody carries a magic 8-ball to give them answers as they go through their days.
Blaydeman - October 27, 2011 - Report this comment
(Artistry) Love the concept! Conceptually this one captured me from the get-go and it did not disappoint. AWESOME!
bobpiecheese - October 30, 2011 - Report this comment
(Artistry) This parody reminds me of an episode of Rocko's Modern Life, where Ed Bighead relied on a magic 8-ball to get his promotions. Great parody here, but Agri does have a good point. All signs point to 555.

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